Begin Again ✔

thirty two

Warning: Mild Abuse.

PARKING CONNOR'S CAR in front of his house, Lea walks into the living room to smell the groping scent of cigarette butts. Filled with the essence of his taste, the room glows bright but there's a sticky mess attached with it that almost forces Lea to sense that something is different.

"Connor," she calls him, her voice soft of a whisper. Silence reverberates through the walls and the faint sound of his car keys dances in her hands as she places them on the table. She lets her eyes wander around the house to locate a familiar face and eventually grabs a note from the table nearby whilst realizing that Connor must have gone out.

Thank you for the car. Lea.

She places the keys on the paper and tucks a strand of her hair behind her ear. The increasing sound of footsteps produces a ringing sound in her ears and she slowly turns her neck to meet Connor's tired face. "Lea," he breathes in surprise.

There is a dark color that surrounds his eyes and his hair is messy, filled with sleep. His voice is groggy, laced in astonishment and Lea wonders for the last time if it was a good thing to drop by at his house to hand him his car keys and thank him in person.

"Hey, Connor," she greets, forcing a smile on her face. " I came to return you car. And, thank you," she says and turns her body to walk away from him to leave his house without uttering a single word.

"Lea, wait," he says.

Immediately, she turns her neck to meet his cold, blue eyes that stare at her mysteriously.

"I-I'm sorry I kissed you that day. I shouldn't have done that," he says, his voice soft and deep at the same time.

"It's fine," she says, stretching her lips to produce an apologetic smile.

"And," he trails off. "We don't talk anymore, Lea."

"It's just that things aren't the best right now, Connor," she says.

Lies.

"Oh," he sums up processing her words. "So, new boyfriend, huh? He isn't treating you well?"

"N-No!" She shrieks. "It isn't about him. I-I mean, it is about him. It's complicated."

"Well," he smirks cockily. "You know I wouldn't bother breaking his knuckles if he tries to hurt you."

Lea cringes in disgust. What?

She stares at him, his eyes, the shape of his eyebrows and the entirety of the face she once fell in love with. Every single thing she once found beautiful doesn't look so beautiful to her anymore.

Why did I fall in love with you?

The question lingers in her mind and she feels his body warmth grow close to her. His breath smells like cigarettes and the light from the windows opposite to him reflects on his face, highlighting his features.

Alec is so much better. So much.

"Do you miss me like I miss you, Lea?" He blurts, a sad smile stinging on his lips that she loved kissing once. "I miss you, Lea. So fucking much." He gathers a strand of her hair and twirls it.

"Okay," Lea says. "Now you're playing the creepy ex."

He chuckles. "Your sense of humor is the best thing about you." He rubs his thumb over his lips and cups her cheek with his hand. "I'm a fucking bastard. I never should have fucked that bitch when I had you."

"Connor," she says, her voice growing strong. "We are not having this conversation again." She exerts an amount of force on his chest to push him away but he's too strong. "I have a boyfriend now."

Boyfriend. She said boyfriend.

"He won't love you like I love you, Lea. We've known each other for years. How long have you known him?"

"Long enough to realize that he's better."

Images of Connor and her flash inside her mind. Him trying to help her with her math homework in middle school. Him riding bicycles with her around their neighborhood. Him tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. Him meeting her lips for the first time in a kiss. Him discovering her secrets and insecurities and making her feel protected. Him loving her.

Everything felt like a fairytale. Pure. Now everything is different. Messy.

"Baby," he breathes on her skin.

"Don't call me that," she warns him, her voice growing strong.

His hand crawls to her wrist, holding it tight. "Stop getting angry, baby. You know I find it sexy."

"Connor, let me go," she seethes, her voice begging and screaming at him. "I need to leave."

His hold on her wrist grows tighter producing a pain that becomes too much for her to bear. Her back hits the wall followed by his force on her body. Placing his hands on the wall on either side of her body such that he was arresting her, he gives her no space to escape.

"Connor!" She screams as the pain on her wrist becomes too unbearable. "Let me go. Please."

"Tell me you miss me," he says. "Tell me you love me."

"You're a psychopath, Connor. You've always been one," she bites with confidence. "One of the reasons I broke up with you."

"Say that again," he seethes, clenching his teeth. He presses his hand on her wrist forcing her to moan in pain.

Immediately, gathering her force on her other arm, she lifts it to meet his face in a slap. A harsh one. "You're fucking insane."

"You bitch," he yells and grabs her hair, pushing her down to the floor. "How fucking dare you?"

Biting back her tears, she stares at him boldly. Lifting herself up from the ground, she rubs the mark of his hand on her wrist.

"Lea," he breathes apologetically, regret lacing his voice. "I'm so sorry. I never meant to do that."

Clenching her teeth, she grabs her bag from the floor and slings it over her shoulders. She walks out of the door without uttering a single word to smell the fresh breeze of morning air but her mind is too messy to inhale in the pleasures of life.

Days and days where Connor would assure her that he'd be the one to protect her, to love her, little did she know that he'd be the one to hurt her in the end. Their relationship was the epitome of what people would call a fairytale but time was always the bitch. Always.

Something in her, something painful, tells her, shrieks at her that what Alec and she had was too pure for the world. She was starting to wonder if the purity of their relationship was going to turn into something messy.

Don't trust. Don't place your trust on anything too much, Lea, she tells herself.

At the rate at which they were going, she starts to wonder if it was the right thing to do anymore.

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A/N: Hey guys! Did you miss me?

I'm really busy with uni but I hope you enjoyed the update. People have been telling that what Alec and Lea have is too good to explain so I hope I summed it up.

And, thank you so much for the 10K reads! *sends huge, virtual teddy bear hugs*

Spread the love, Nova x