MY PUMPKIN PROFESSOR (My Pumpkin Gyo-soh-nim)

CHOICES AND PROMISES

SHOCK was an understatement. Kyuhyun had not expected what Sungmin said. He stared at the monitor and Heechul stood up cursing up a storm. Catatonic in the news that broke his heart, Kyuhyun could not even ask the question out loud. Is it really too late for us?

He was about to close the laptop just before he heard the first choking sob come out. He ran out of his bedroom to go to the bathroom because he knew Heechul wouldn't have wanted to log out. He just didn't want anyone to see him crying.

He'd given up his spot for the musical. He didn't want to stay and his understudy was going to take his place. He was going to go back to South Korea to be with Sungmin or at the very least take him to America so they don't have to be apart. He'd found a way for that to be something Sungmin would not be afraid of. He was going to take care of where they'd be staying and all that Sungmin needed to worry about was what he would be doing in America when he arrives. They were going to get married here once they were able to settle in. Or go to Canada and get married there or Holland or wherever then come and live together in New York, him performing and teaching music and Sungmin doing pretty much the same. They'd start off using their own space and perhaps later on have their own small academy.

But dreams, his dreams at least were way too advanced for his own good. At least he was consistent. Sungmin didn't want to move on from the life that he already had, secure in the academe and dating a freshman. It was like he was starting over and with that act of repeating the past, he was trying to erase what they had and replace him with that new freshman he was with.

The tears were falling but he could not cry out. He was sobbing softly but painfully. He was trying to let it out but it just wouldn't let him. He pressed on his chest hoping that applying pressure would make the pain subside. No, it wasn't an explosion of pain. It was a gradual yet excruciating tearing of his heart. He felt the lack of breath but he could not hear himself gasping.

HEECHUL found him like that. Gasping with no sound. He grabbed Kyu by the shoulders and shook him even if he wanted to hold his friend to him. Compassion would lock him up. He needed to hear his friend scream or he might loose his voice forever. He almost did once. Heechul was not going to let that happen. At least not to his maknae.

"Snap!Out!Of!It!" he kept saying the words loudly, individually as he kept shaking Kyu who let him. Then when it seemed like Kyu was going to collapse from what he was doing Heechul heard a croak then a sob then a blood-curling scream.

"Noooooooooooooo!" Kyu was trying to say more but all he could say was that one syllable of painful denial. "No no no no. No. No no. No no no no no. No-oh-no...no..." his tone was that of someone saying This is isn't happening. Take it back. It's not true.

Only then did Heechul embrace his brother. "We'll get him back. I promise."

TAO held Sungmin to him after the latter settled next to him. Tao made him sit on his lap and Sungmin cried softly in his arms. The rest of SUJU was looking at them like they were trying their best not to explode in questions. So he decided it would be better if he just told them what the real deal was.

"We went out on a date last night and I stayed here with him. I don't care if he's older than me and that I am a student here. I'll take responsibility for it if anything happens. But I can assure you that even when all is said and done, I am not going to leave Sungmin just because it's more convenient for me to be in love with a man in another place, in another culture. I am not that kind of a fool." He felt Sungmin stiffen in the beginning but softened and moulded into his embrace when he mentioned the part about never leaving him.