Flames || Rhink

Dead End

All I did was sleep. I passed off food and took as few trips to the bathroom as possible. I didn't want to move. I didn't want to shake up some new feeling inside myself. I didn't want to look at the matches, because I knew once I did, I wouldn't be able to stop.

But as the days grew on, as I ignored more and more calls from Rhett, I couldn't bare one more second in my house. So I picked myself up and threw on the cleanest clothes I could find.

The sun was hot against my pale skin and I instantly felt the sweat pick up as I stepped outside. I got in my car and drove with the windows down. 

I didn't know where I was going, I just drove. At stop lights, I would watch the people on the sidewalks. Some walking with their families and others on the their phones, buried in their own little worlds.

The light would turn green and I would drive again until the next light where I would stop to see couples walking their pets and active people jogging.

The world hadn't stopped for anyone but me. It was such a surreal feeling. To see something so happy and healthy, while you felt absolutely miserable.

All because your best friend broke up with you.

I knew how petty and pathetic I was being. I knew I was being utterly ridiculous. I quit the job I had done and loved for so long all because I couldn't be in the same room with Rhett any longer.

All those years filming Good Mythical Morning  just to end it in a split second under a hasty thought. I ruined myself. Over him.

I drove past houses and houses until I reached a dead end. My mind ran wild with thought. 

Where do I go from here? How will I live?

I turned back. My tank was almost empty when I reached the dollar store.

I looked at myself in the rear view mirror and swallowed my pride.

The guy from the other day was working. He was ringing up the only customer in the store.

He looked up at me, recognizing my sad, sad face.

"You're back so soon. Need another lighter?" he asked, a grin playing along his face.

I shook my head, "A job."

His eyes widened, "Oh, really? When can you start?"

I was at the  end of my rope.

"Now."

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Well, it's raining real hard outside and the storm is coming. It's about to get real windy here in South Georgia, folks. But I managed to squeeze in a little update for you guys. I hope you enjoy it and I hope you're all excited to see where this goes! I'm so sorry I haven't been on my A-game lately. I'll work on it. Thanks so much for reading! You guys are truly amazing!

Thanks for being your mythical best!

-Robin