(Hey guys! Welcome back! Please, be sure to read the chapter before this titled "Dead End". I'm not sure if Wattpad is updating you guys. Thanks for reading! Enjoy!)
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The flicker of the match was bright in the darkness of my bathroom. I held it close to my face, feeling it's warmth, smelling it's smoky tone.
I watched it struggle beneath my breath, fighting to stay alive.
I pushed it into my thigh, it's flame burning out immediately. It felt good.
I lit another one, then one more.
I felt nothing. This was routine for me now. I had become a slave to a stick who didn't even breath. Or did it?
Do matches feel pain? They burn up and die because we light them.
Letting out a deep breath, I reach for another match.
But stopped suddenly, a new thought wrapping it's tiny hands around my brain.
I stand, flipping the switch in the bathroom. A dim light turns on, and I see them almost instantly. I grab one and rest my thumb on it's switch. I flick.
It's small flame looks identical to the matches but this one seemed stronger. This one would last.
I looked at myself in the mirror. I was bare, nothing but a blank canvas. All for except my legs. They were covered in paint, red, red paint.
I pressed the lighter against my stomach. It hurt. It was much worse than the small touch of a match. It lingered until I told it to stop.
Maybe I did have some control, I thought.
I looked at the spot I had just made at the lower right side of my stomach.
It was darker, more evident. Rubbing my finger across it, I felt the sting of pain.
It was rough, hot.
I tried again. Just above it. Making a set of eyes. Then I added a nose and a mouth. It smiled.
By then, I felt the tears brimming my eyes.
I laid down the lighter and picked up the matches. I stored them under my sink and slid back into my clothes.
I tiptoed through my house, back to my bed.
I would start my new job tomorrow. 8 a.m. sharp.
Sleep was calling my name.
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Guys, I know this chapter is packed full of the word "I"
I suck at life. But this is just a fanfiction. Nothing crazy so I'll let it be, I guess. Thank you guys so much for reading! I hope you enjoy!
Thanks for being your mythical best!
-Robin
YOU ARE READING
Flames || Rhink
Fanfiction"Why do you do it?" "I like the way it makes me feel." "How does it make you feel?" "Numb." ---warning: self-harm.