You're the reason why I breathe.

Preparations

"I'm not going." I snapped at my sister, wanting me to go see some type of.. I don't even know, but it's a band she's been fangirling over the past year, and I decided to buy tickets for her and her friend to go, not so me and HER could go. I wanted to stay home, listen to HIM, and read my books like I would normally do.

"But Rickyyyyy!" She whined, flopping down onto my bed next to me. "I really want you to go! Besides, the singer is MAD sexy."

"Now I really don't want to go."

"Why not!?"

"Because what if I do find him sexy, huh!? You KNOW what happened with my last relationship!"  I yelled,  wanting her to leave me alone to my music. I rolled over on my side hoping that she would leave me alone. 

"He's not going to hurt you like Matthew did, Richard." She said in the most bitchiest tone in the world. I groaned and buried my face into my pillow and covered my ears. "weave me awone." I mumbled through my pillow. 

"The concert is tonight at 6, get ready. Love you." She said, getting up and walking out of the room. I sighed deeply and sat up. "I might as well go.." I mumbled to myself, kicking the covers off of my legs and rolling onto my stomach to stretch. 

"I know the guys too!" My eyes widened and I really started to think going to that concert over. What if she told them about me? What if she told them about my past life? Nevermind that, what if she told them what my ex did to me?

I know what you're thinking.

Hi, My name is Ricky Olson. I swear to god if you ever call me by my full name I will murder you in your sleep and make it look like a mistake. I'm 19 years old, and I am a mess. I don't know why i'm still around. The things my ex did to me made me want to kill myself. And I almost suceeded, but my sister decided it would be better if her big brother didn't bleed out all over her snow white covers and that it would be better if I was alive. I've hid in my room ever since I got out of that traumatizing relationship. He told me he loved me.. He said he would never do anything to hurt me. So why would he touch me in ways I didn't want to be touched? Why would he take something so dear to me, something I was waiting to give to him, and something I was waiting till I was comfortable enough to give to him, away from me? Oh right "Because he didn't love me. He was using me." My sister always tells me when I have my little emotional breakdowns curled up in a ball in the nearest corner I can find.

The memories  will haunt me forever..