Creek Blues (Jalsey)

1. Poison

***Trigger warning for self harm and alcoholism. If you're reading this and haven't read Lividity yet, I'd actually suggest you read that first.***

Wait to start the song.

Josh didn't feel anything as they waited for the doctor to come back into the room. His body still ached from the alcohol poisoning, too small to handle so much toxicity. He glanced at his little sister, Abbie, who was shaking beside him on the hospital bed. She was small too. He grabbed the seven-year-old's hand beneath the sheets.

Their father was sitting on the bed with them as well. His arm was wrapped protectively around Josh's shoulders, his hand resting atop Abbie's messy red hair. With his arm wrapped protectively around his small children, he looked less like a big scary cop with a gun. He was still in his uniform though. They must've called him at the station when Josh was brought into the emergency room.

It made Josh's already weak arms ache as he lifted his sister into his lap, only for his father to move her out of it and into his own. "I got her, bud," Officer Dun told Josh carefully, sounding like he was afraid to speak too loudly.

The almost lazy drawl of his father's thick Southern accent made Josh feel more comfortable. It was familiar. It was a sound that he knew meant whatever was bothering him was going to go away. It was a safe sound.

Abbie reached her hand out for Josh's again. He took it carefully, just like his daddy taught him to. He'd told Josh the same words over and over ever since Abbie had been born. "You gotta be real soft when you touch her, Joshua. You may be big and tough, but she's still just an itty bitty thing. If you break her, we can't fix her. She'll be gone."

Readjusting back to life without Abbie would be weird, so he did what he could to be nice. He still messed up sometimes and hurt her or made her do things that got her hurt, but he never did it on purpose. And if he did do it on purpose, it wasn't his fault. He couldn't help it.

"Daddy, am I in trouble?" Josh asked curiously, tugging at the hospital bracelet around his scarred wrist.

Officer Dun looked tired. He probably had trouble sleeping, though, while his eleven-year-old was being treated for alcohol poisoning. Josh didn't understand why he worried so much about stuff like that. It wasn't like worrying would fix anything. If anything, it just annoyed Josh and caused more problems.

"I ain't decided yet, Joshua. We ain't gonna worry bout that none til we hear what that goddamn doctor's gonna say," Officer Dun told Josh, looking at him with that weird expression that wasn't just sad.

Josh studied his father's face carefully, glaring at the man when he couldn't figure it out. Abbie whimpered and his father protested when Josh yanked the little girl into his own lap before pushing against his dad's side roughly.

"Get the fuck away from me. I don't want you here!" Josh told him angrily, not caring much that Abbie was starting to cry again as he pushed against his father as hard as he could before punching his shoulder.

His father grabbed both of his wrists, pushing him back down on the bed and holding him down no matter how hard he tried to fight him off. He hated his father for looking so patient right now.

"Don't you hit me, kid," his father told him worriedly. "You ain't even angry. You're frustrated. That's different. You gotta breathe."

"I'm not frustrated!" Josh yelled, nearly knocking Abbie off of the bed as he tried to fight his way out of his father's grip. She climbed out of his lap as quickly as possible. "I just hate you. I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!"