High Emotions ; Phan au

Twelve

"You're only saying that make me feel better. It's not true." Dan mumbled and looked down, feeling a little self conscious because of how close his face was to Phil's. He pursed his lips and colour rose to his cheeks.

"Yes it is true Dan, every word of it." Phil said becoming flushed as he saw Dans eyes wander to his lips for a flash second, he wanted to close the gap, there was nothing holding him back but instead he placed his forehead against Dans, ever so slightly rubbing his nose against Dans, holding his as tight as he could without hurting him

Dan's heart was beating at a million miles an hour. He could barely think. Phil was so close. He could kiss him if he wanted. Their noses were touching Dan's eyes were closed. He could feel his throat tighten. The only thing anchoring him was the fact that Phil would never kiss him because phil was with Alex.

For the first time Phil has butterflies being this close to anyone, his heart racing as he wanted to kiss him. He was so close and there was something like fate wanting to bring his lips to Dan. But he couldn't bring himself to take advantage of Dans vulnerability

Dan knew he was the only one feeling the tension between them. Because really, why would Phil want to kiss him? He bit his lip to hard it bled a little. He let out a soft shaky breath. He was going to focus on paying off the 7000 first and then see if he still wanted to live.

"Dan?" Phil whispered, feelings the unsure and nervous energy of Dan through the shakiness in Dans body

"Y-Yeah?" Dan whispered back in a small and scared voice. He was shaking so much. God. He was so pathetic.

"Am I going to fuck everything up again if-" Phil said, finding it hard to get his words, quickly finding the courage to say "if- I want to kiss you right now?"

"W-What?" Dan's eyes widened and he pulled back a little to look at Phil. He must have heard him wrong. There was so no way he had heard him right.

"You're really going to make me say it again-" Phil laughed shyly, unsure on Dans emotions, whether his reaction was good or bad "- I said - if I would fuck everything up if I said how much I want to kiss you right now."

"But, A-Alex?" Dan looked down. Why would Phil want that? Dan felt like it might be out of pity or something. Because there was no way Phil wanted him.

That name brought Phils head back down to the dumps "fuck, shit yeah I completely forgot Alex existed." Phil said with an angry tone, the name bitter on his tongue

"I'm sorry." Dan said immediately. Phil sounded angry. He looked down and screwed his eyes shut out of instinct. Maybe Dan had messed up unknowingly yet again.

"Why are you apologising Dan, it's my fault for having a fucking boyfriend." Phil sighed, gently placing Dan back down onto his wheelchair, unsure of what to do

Dan wasn't sure what to say to that so he just kept his eyes down. His heart was racing because of a different reason now. He was scared. He was scared that Phil would start yelling at him again and get angry. Dan didnt want that.

Phil eyes caught the syringe on the side, "hey let me do your medication yeah?" Phil said trying to bring a new subject about, but his heart was screaming for him to just pull Dan into his arms and kiss him. That had never happened before

Dan swallowed thickly and nodded as he held his arm out. The area around the inside of his elbow was bruised because of the IV and all the injections he had. He felt scared so he decided to do as Phil asked.