CHAPTER THIRTY THREE:
As I hike back down, so many things run through my mind. We've been through so much together... him and his mom saving me from my dad, him "cheating" on me, saving my life at the beach, punching him in the face, the whole pain pill incident, him saving me from Liam, him proposing to me, quitting the band, being pregnant....
Shit.
I never actually sat there and thought of every single thing we've been through, we honestly have been through so much... and he wanted to throw that away... he wanted to leave me alone... he was going to kill himself.
I finally make it to the car and start it.
Should I go back for him? I start questioning myself as I look back at the trail. Seeing him like that breaks my heart, I really do love him so much. But he was really going to kill himself.
He was really going to leave me alone. Just leave me and this child.
I look down and hold my stomach, really letting his actions sink in. My anger starts to come back.
I just need to get out of here now.
As I make it back on to the interstate, I feel myself start to calm down a little. I just need to completely clear my mind and I'll be fine.
I decide to listen to some music, so I turn on the radio.
I catch the last thirty seconds of Boyfriend by Justin Bieber. Instantly I feel better. I immediately recognize the next song that starts playing. My heart drops.
Really?
I can't believe what I'm hearing.
Same Mistakes. What the fuck? Out of all the songs you can play, they had to pick this one?
My lip starts to quiver as I listen to the words. My heart feels like it's been stabbed with a knife, then someone pulled the knife out and stabbed me a million more times.
Tears just start pouring out from everything that's happened.
I immediately turn the radio off. Just as I thought I was calming down, I feel my anger come back. I hit the steering wheel and peer out at the road through my tears.
I need to get home.
I start to speed, trying desperately to hurry home. It starts getting hard to see from my blurred vision caused by the tears. I wipe my eyes, blacking out the view for only a second.
When I pull my hand away and blink, I see a red stop light that I'm running. I start hearing loud honking uncontrollable. I look over and see a black car racing towards me, trying to avoid me. I see it coming in slow motion.. I just can't react fast enough though.
I can hear the car slam into the side of my car. The impact causes me to hit my head on the steering wheel. I try to stay awake, but everything starts to fade to black.
I blink my eyes open and see pale white walls and closed curtains. The room is dimmed lighting and I spas for a moment from not realizing where I am... then I realize I'm in a hospital bed.
I try to remember what just happened.
I look over at the edge to see a figure. I'm guessing it's the nurse.
"Ashley?"
I was wrong... it's Harry.
What's he doing here?
...He probably followed me and saw everything.
"This is all my fault." He says as he sits on the edge of the bed. I don't respond because deep down I really do feel like it's his fault.
I'm glad he's here so I'm not alone, but I'm still mad at him.
"I was weak. I should've never went. I don't even know what I was thinking, honestly. My head was so full of so many emotions, I didn't know how to handle it." He looks sincere and grabs my hand.
"You saved my life."
I look up at him, "I guess we're even." I say with a weak smile. It's hard to stay mad at him.
"I'm so sorry, baby!" He reaches over and kisses me on the forehead, "Can you forgive me?" As much as I want to run into his arms for not jumping... the reality is, even though he's here and apologized, we have way too many problems that we need to work on.
"Harrry, I love you, but... I just need some... time." I say as I look away.
"How does a lifetime sound?" He says as he pulls the ring out.
I can't help but smile. No matter what we go through or what happens to us, he always makes me smile. I love this boy so much.
