Be A Father Not A Dad

Dad ?!

It's 5Am And They Up With All This Damn Yelling They Got Too My Bunk And Yelled " Gaulden Its Chow Time " I Looked At Them And Wipped The Cole Out My Eye I Was In Cell By Myself So It Was Straight I Brushed My Teeth And Stood At The Gate For Them Too Open It . I Could Have Been Posted Bail But They Holding Me On Charges From When I Was A Kid . I Walked Down The Stairs And Grabbed A Tray I Got In Line Too Get My Food And Took A Seat With The Older Homies I Started Eating When A Kid Name Trey Approached Me He Looked Around 17 he Sat With Me Until The Big Homies Told Him He Couldn't Sit There

" Aye Big Homie Chill " I Said

" He Ain't Welcomed Over Here This For Big Homies Only " Said One Of The Guys

" This A Free Country And Last Time I Checked You Can Tell Nobody Where Too Sit " I Said

" Listen Young Boy I Respect You and All But You Can Go Sit With Him If Yo Want Too " Said The Homie

" So Why Y'all Let Me Sit Here Then ?" I Asked

" Cause You One Of Us " He Said

" And He Is Too " I Said

Before I Looked The Kid Was Gone Too Another Table then It was A Kid I Didn't Like Who I Got Into It With The First Night I Was Booked He Came and Dapped The Big Homies And Then Looked At Me

" Why He Sitting Here ?" Asked The Boy

" Because I Can " I Said

" Nah Baby Boy Got Balls " Said Donte

" Move Out My Spot Buster " he Said Too Me

" Make Me " I Said Standing Up

He Put His Tray Down And I Picked Mines Up And Smashed Him With It Then We Got Too Punching I Heard The Alarm Go Off And I Was Being Sprayed And Thrown Too The Ground I Looked At Donte And Shook My Head Then I Heard One Guard Say Throw Them in The Box No Phone And No Visit After They Locked Down The Building And Put Me On Lock Down And Took Donte Too The Jail nurse They told Me That He Was Bleeding I Couldn't Believe I Got In Trouble And I Was Just Talking Too Ken About This Shit Now Look At Me . I Know Ben And Montana Was Gone Be Pissed When They Found Out I Got In Trouble Cause They Gone say You Was Just Tellin Ken Too Stay Out Of Trouble But He Sized My Shit So They'll Understand The Guard Opened The Box Door And Looked At Me

" Say Man What's The Deal Y'all Gone Keep Me In Here Or You Gone Let Me Out ?" I asked

" We Gone Keep You In Here For 30 Days With No Phone Calls No Visits And No Outside Time " he Said

" Aye Send Officer Lorenz In Here " I Told Him

" for What ?" He Asked

" Because I'm More Comfortable Talking Too Him Then I Am Talking Too You " I Shot Back

He Closed The Door And I Sat I Started Unbuttoning My Jumper Because it Was Getting Hot 5 Minutes Later Officer Lorenz Came In He Closed The Door Behind Him And I Was Trying Too Figure Out Why ? cause I Ain't On That Gay Shit And If He Wanted Too Strap We Needed More Space Then This

" Wassup Man Why You Round Here Fighting People ?" he Asked Me

" Cause He had Been Trying Me Every Since I Came In Here " I Told Him

" You Can't Be Doing That Now You In This Hot Ass Box For 30 Days " He Told Me

" I Know Cause I Was Just Talking Too My Lil Brother Ken About This Shit " I Said

I Seen His Eyes Get Wide When I Said Ken Name

" Wait You Said You Was Talking Too Who ? " He Asked

" My Lil Brother Ken " I Said Raising My Eye Brows

" Kentrell ?" He Asked

" Say Man Don't Say That Name That Ain't Me My Name Young Boy " I Said

" It's Me Your Dad " He Said

I Took A Stepback And Examed Him From When We Was Younger I Was Shocked

" Aye Man Bounce Up Out My Cell " I Said

" Wait Let Me Talk Too You " I Said

" You Ain't Got Shit Too Talk Too Me About " I Said

" Kentrell Let Me Explain Please " He Said Too Me

" What ? huh What Do You Have Too Say Too Me ? "I Asked

" Son I'm Sorry I Left I Should Have Been There For You Ken And Kendra Instead Of Leaving Her " He Said

" Fuck That You Couldn't Teach Me How Too Be A Man I Got Three Lil Boys Kayden Jayden And King They Don't Know You Hell I Don't Even Know You. You Wasn't There Too Teach Me Or Ken How Too Be Men Growing Up I Heart A lot Of Women In My Life Because Of Your Ass " I Said Hurt

" I Know Just Please Calm Down " He Said

" Calm Down ? me Calm Down ? fuck That All This Time I Wanted A Dad I Couldn't Have A Dad Because My Dad Ran Out When My Mom Got Pregnant With His Daughter And My Mom Had Too Raise Too Boys And A Girl On Her Own And One Of Her Sons Can't Stop Running The Streets Getting In Trouble The Other Ones Is Straight Too Hell With You Man " I Said Walking Away

" Kentrell Desean Gaulden Listen Too Me " He Said Too Me

" Fuck You Man You Ain't My Daddy Or My Father Before You Try Too Step Down On Me Be A Father Not A Dad " I Said

He Tried Too Appraoch Me And Hug Me But I Backed Away I Asked The Guards Too Come Get Him Out My Cell they Came And Opened The Door He Took One Last Glance At Me I Slip Down The Wall And Started Crying I Know Y'all Probably Like He A Punk But Nah Like Me Ever Seeing My Dad Never Ran Cross My Mind He Left When We Was Young Now Me Seeing Him As A Prison Guard Means He Got His life Together I Just Wish He Got it Together With Us Too I Probably Wouldn't Be So Angry . I punched The Wall Hurting My Hand And It Swelled Up now How Am I Suppose Too Tell My Brother And Sister That I Seen Our Dad And He A Prison Officer ?