I Want to be Your Last Everything

Happy?

I looked up at him, staring at him, for any reaction. "Then why did you ask me to forget about that night?" "Because I was afraid, of what you would say. I know you are in love with Iris, I just didn't want to get in the way of that." "Iris and I weren't even dating when that happened. Cait that night was a roller coaster. If we would have had sex, we both would have regretted it." "I know, but why did we kiss?" "I-I don't know." "Can't blame it on the alcohol, I wasn't drunk and you can't get drunk." We stayed quiet, listening to the machines go on for a while. I started to speak, but softer. "I told Cisco, he was the one who suggested I called you. I didn't want to since you are engaged to Iris." "This has nothing to do with Iris... And what happened that night was a mistake." "A mistake... right. That still doesn't give me much." "What do you want me to say? That it wasn't, that I wanted that to happen?" He started to pick up his voice and so did I. "DID YOU?! OR WAS THIS JUST AN ACT JUST WHY BARRY, WHY DI-" "BECAUSE I WANTED TO." I looked up at him, out of breath. I looked at him confused, but then I heard him whisper, "But now that's over, and I am with Iris...I'm sorry." I looked at him not caring for my tears, "I guess that is what you do best Barry, fuck people up then leave them confused." "No that's not me, that whole night was too messy, it would have been full of regrets." "I am done talking Barry, thanks for clearing some stuff up." "Cait don't go, let's talk more." He had grabbed my hand and pointed his head, to sit down again. I agreed, just to hear what he wanted to say. "Cait, Iris and I are happy, we are going to get married, so please don't tell her what happened, that night wasn't important." "Then why does it seem so important that you can't even tell your fiancé?" "Just promise me." "Okay I won't tell, but please don't hide this from Iris, I would want to know if you'd almost hooked up with a person I see everyday." With that I left. Not turning back, yet I still felt the rush of air past me and I swore for a second, I saw Barry look at me.

It was the next day, and last night I could not sleep, I kept repeating what Barry and I had said to each other. It seemed harsh. I decided to get up an hour earlier since I already couldn't sleep, I headed over to Jitters. I grabbed my usual flash and sat down, reading the newspaper. I sat in my usual spot, looking forward at the door seeing everyone come and go. Today not many people came, but someone caught my eye. He was tall, short brown hair, defined muscles, no facial hair, he was wearing a suit with a bow tie, and black shoes. Even through that suit you could see his muscles. I was a little bit in awe. Forgetting everything that happened over these last months, I stared at him forgetting everything. He noticed me staring and smiled, It seemed that he had green eyes. He walked over to me, and I began to panic. "Hey there." "Hi." "What's your name? Mine's Eric." I smiled, "Caitlin Snow." "Nice to meet you Caitlin." He reached out his hand and I shaked it. "Whoah you are cold." I smiled but muttered, You have no idea. "You are so beautiful, I was wondering if I could take you out?" "I'd love to. Here's my address and number." "I'll pick you up at 8." With that he left. Leaving me awestruck.

I sat there for 5 more minutes then looked at the time. I had to get to S.T.A.R Labs. I got in my car and drove, still smiling. I walked into S.T.A.R Labs with a smile on face, and like always being the first one there. I sat down at the computer, drinking coffee. 30 minutes later Cisco arrived also with coffee. "Hi Cisco." He saw me smiling and turned his head sideways. "I'm guessing the talk with Barry went well?" Then I remembered me and Barry's conversation. "Oh, no that went kinda bad, kinda good i don't know what to think of it." "Then why so happy?" "I met someone today at Jitter's, his name is Eric." I smiled once more. "Are you going to see him again?" "Tonight at 8 actually." Cisco was about to say something, but then we heard Barry come in with Iris. Barry looked at me and also looked at me weird. "Good morning everybody!" I felt friendly today. "Morning caitlin." "Morning Cait." Barry and Iris seemed a bit distant today, but that wasn't any of my concern. Iris came over to me. "Hey why so happy?" "I met someone!" "OMG What?!? Who?" I told her who and how he looked, and we both screamed of happiness. "I'm so happy for you Caitlin, I hope the date goes well." "Me too, but enough of me, how is it with you and Barry?" "Well last night he came home all weird, upset kind of, I asked what was wrong and he just said he was tired. He's keeping something from me, I can feel it." "You should just ask him what's wrong, confront him, don't let him go." "I know, I just worry we'll get in a big fight." "Then I will be here for you, I promise." She nodded. "Well I have to get back to work, but I'll talk to him tonight. Good luck on your date, I bet you'll look gorgeous." I smiled and gave her a hug goodbye. She went up to Barry but the best she could get was a kiss on the cheek. I walked over to Barry. "Can I talk to you?" He nodded and he followed me to Cisco's gadget room. "What the hell was that?" "What?" "Stop ignoring Iris, she is feeling like it is her fault. Stop it." "Okay." "Don't do that. Don't push others away. What is truly wrong?" "The talk we had, made me question things. I know I should tell her but I'm afraid I might lose her." "Me too, but she needs to know." "I know, but I think I'll wait." "It will just keep eating at you inside." "That's for me to decide." I nodded. I turned to leave, but he grabbed my arm. What was with him and doing this. "What?" "I heard you were going on a date tonight." "I am, why?" "No reason, but he is one lucky guy." He headed toward the door, but I couldn't keep it in. "You don't get to do that." "Do what?" "That. play dumb, and do that, I am finally past you, but you-" "Past me?" "Yes, I liked you but now I am finally going on a date, but I bet since another guy likes me you get like this. Why, Why me?" I started to cry. "All I said that he was lucky." "Exactly..." I said that softer than a whisper, i was done, I broke down. Barry Allen, broke me. "Cait, I didn't know." "How could you, I never made it obvious, and Iris is my best friend too, how do you think I feel? I feel like a traitor." "I'm sorry." "I know, me too." He walked out and so did I. I went back to my desk, typing and reading away.