Rant

wow so cool man

Okay so I don't even know but its here and its queer

hi im Vegas

(This is just fucked up stories about my childhood so enjoyyy)

So my mom asked me (After I came out)

"Are you depressed?"

And, at the time, I wasn't so I said

"No, but I used to be.."

And she kinda just left like

"Wow I have so many children I cant even tell if one of them wants to die"

But now im depressed and a lot more open about my feelings than I was so yaayyyyy

SO totally off topic but whatev

So I used to be really depressed and like nothing would make me happy

I didn't want to worry my friends so I acted okay and fine and all that shit (My friends are actually really nice and they actually pulled me out of depression so thanks I guess)

And I was know as 'THE' weird one

and for me that was a title

like it was the hall of fame for little 10 year old me

And being different was cool and really accepted at my school so I got one of the cool 10 year old girls to be my friend (Hi cat if youre reading this ily and I hope you have a good life C:)

She was like my go-to friend y'know

But the thing with being the weird one was I had to always be happy and hyper and loud all the damn time

And sometimes I would go to school and she wasn't there so I would just sit down and and put my backpack on my lap (to cover my face, I was also really insecure) and think.

That's all I did

I was a super fucked up child like my mom undoubtedly dropped me multiple times when I was a baby but anyways

I would act that way and sometimes people wouldn't notice

I felt like I was unimportant and useless

like if I didn't have cat then nobody would actually know I exist

I was never bullied like ever

So I bullied myself

I always saw that successful people had some kind of problem or metal health issue that they had to face (I watched a lot of skydoesminecraft)

At this time I didn't know I was depressed

so I kinda was like

"Whats wrong with me? Why don't I have a problem?"

While people with a problem were like

"Whats wrong with me? Why do I have a problem?"

but then I fixed it but I don't really know how I did so this story ends here

nExT sToRy

okay so im like really influenced by people

like

I live in Hawaii and like 90% of the people at my school had straight hair

and that really affected me like

"Why couldn't I be born like them?"

bc I have curly hair (Which I now really like bc ima get my hair cut really short and it looks really good with curly hair but off topic so bye)

also like half of them were Asian and I always thought that Asian girls were really pretty so I hated my race aswell so cool

if you sit me next to someone who uses 'legit' a lot then I will start saying 'legit'

if you sit me next to someone who dresses in shorts and a t-shirt then I will slowly start to wear t-shirts a shorts more often (but I have to be around the person a lot and like them to an extent)

I am also getting a short haircut because I really like miles and I think his hair is really cool,

yes I know that's creepy

uhhh I don't know how to end this so here a picture of the love of my life miles

okay byeeeeeee

also im gay and trans just thought Id say that and no this is not because of miles he only helped me realize that im going to hell <3