June 30th, 1994

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So, the urge it seems gives me the drive to do what needs to be done including cleaning up the mess I make. I still have not dealt with the man who I killed on the trail and it turns out the woman was his wife. She is still blindfolded with his corpse rotting in the room in the basement. She begs to see her husband and has pleaded to let her call him. She clearly is not aware he has been dead across the room from her for days now.

The smell the body is causing in the room has caused me to vomit many times. Every time I go into feed her or switch out the bucket she is using for the washroom I find myself throwing up. It seems my stomach is not strong enough without the urge and now the urge has been silent since the excitement on the trail. I need to get rid of the body and deal with the woman soon before the suspicion turns my way.

The couple has already been reported missing by friends and family and the blood found on the trail this morning has not been any help. Keeping victims longer than a few days runs the risk of getting caught. I will deal with the dead body this evening, somehow – with or without the sense of urge and the woman I will finish off in the next day or so.

If the urge does not return beforehand I will have to deal with it without it.

- Joshua


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