unwavering feelings | panwink

[10]

Class hours are finished and I'm right here in the door of the gym watching Guanlin practicing, I was rejected when I didn't even confess to him, my numb feelings are in me right now. Just let it hit in me that I can't reach him.

Suddenly my phone rungs up, I quickly fished my phone answering the call without knowing who's the one that is calling me.

"Jihoon-ah."

"Daniel Hyung?" I said

"Where are you?"

I looked around and I realized that it was kinda loud here in the gym since Guanlin's fans club are in here, I paced myself to get where I'm standing finding a place that is more quite, Totally forgetting about Guanlin

"I'm at school right now Daniel hyung." I answered to the hyung

"Want me to get you?" I stopped for a minute analyzing what just Daniel Hyung said.

"Excuse me, hyung?"

"Yah, I'm inviting you dinner in short." He casually says on the other line, I know that he's grinning. Maybe Daniel Hyung can make me feel better and forget this whole indirect rejection thing.

"That's fine with me Hyung." I heard his yes on the other line.

"I'm going to pick you up now, wait for me." He excited exclaimed to me.

"W-Wait Daniel Hyung, do you eve-" before I could finished my sentence he already ended the call, does that hyung even know where I school I attend? Even though I'm unsure I waited for Daniel hyung outside.

It was past 20 minutes, that hyung surely knows how to ask questions, ironically. I'm still waiting for him leaning on the shed.

"Yah, why are you still here?" I jumped over the voice who talked to me, placing my hands in my heart. Yet when I realized who's the person that's talking to me I clenched through my clothes feeling the harsh yet painful heartbeat.

"Am I that scary?" Guanlin curiously asked to me, I don't want to talk to him.

"No" I said while unclenching my clothes standing properly not looking at him, I want to be cold, I want to be emotionless in front of him. Why can't this person know that I'm so broken right now, that all he do to me makes me think that There's hope that he'll likes me too.

"What, you're in the bad mood?" He came closer to me, while I stayed away and creating some distance.

"No." Still not looking at him.

"You're not still going home, it's getting-"

"I'm waiting for someone." I coldly said to him.

"Who is it?" His tone of voice changed in a serious tone, sending shivers in my veins yet I'll be strong not to be affected by him.

"A Hyung." Not saying Daniel's Hyung name.

"Jihoon, who is it?" He insisted again getting closer to me.

"Hyung." I answered again.

"Is it Daniel Hyung?"

"Who knows." Not looking at him, though I wanted to stop this because what's the point at making conversation with Guanlin right now.

"Jihoon, tell me right now! Who's that hyung, is it Daniel Hyung?!" He raised his voice which made snapped out of myself.

"Guanlin, stop! Why are you so concern about the person that I'm going to meet? It is Daniel hyung, so what? Do I need to tell you about this kind of things? We're not ina relationship, I mean we're not even friends, not even close to friends, yet why are you treating me like you're someone that's important to my life, huh? Guanlin I don't understand you anymore, stop making a mess, please stop messing with my feelings. I like you but shit I think I need to give up because you won't even notice that."

Finally my tears came out in front of of Guanlin, he didn't reply yet he was still there maybe dumbfounded, at the same time a car parked infront of the two us the owner of the car gets out, and it was Daniel hyung who ran towards me quickly to know why I am in this state.

"Jihoon.." I hear Guanlin calling me yet I feel so numb right now not wanting to get things complicated.

"Guanlin, I'll be the one who's gonna take care Jihoon today." Daniel hyung stopping Guanlin, and escorted me inside the car which is beside in the drivers seat, after that he come to the drivers seat starting the engine. When we take off I saw Guanlin's reflection in the mirror of the car, he was kinda lifeless yet I don't want to know what's the reason behind it.

I can't know what kind of feelings I have now for Guanlin. When I felt my eyes are heavy knowing I'm sleepy, I fight back not to close my eyes but I was defeated by my exhaustion. Fast asleep in the whole time, not even saying a thank you to what Daniel Hyung did earlier.

-

I woke up seeing I'm still in Daniel's hyung car, but he's not with me anymore, I realized that I have now a small blanket covering my body, thinking that Daniel hyung who's behind of this thing.

I didn't leave the car and waited for him not knowing where is this place, after a couple of minutes the door of the car starting to ooen and I saw Daniel Hyung coming inside sitting at his place again.

"You're awake, want some foods?" He said while he was gesturing to the plastics he holds, I nodded to him because I can feel myself starving too, he gave to me my portion and for him, we started eating covering with silence not even a single word can be heard but just our noise of eating food can be hear.

When the two of us finished he take care all of the trash and put it all in one plastic taking it at the back seat, maybe he'll throw it later.

"Jihoon, why are you crying earlier?" He asked to me, I stayed silent for a minute because I don't know how to answer his question, I know Daniel hyung is a good person but I never really know him that well. So it's kinda awkward for me to open up to him.

"It's okay if you're not going to tell me." He added.

My conscience hit me, Daniel hyung is a caring person yet I can't even say to him the reason why I am crying in front of Guanlin earlier. Minutes have passed yet silence is the only thing I can feel right now.

"Do you want to play?" Daniel hyung tried to approach me again, this time I nodded I don't want to waste Daniel hyung's effort on me now. He started the engine and hit off the road again.

"Let's go to an arcade." He smiled at me, I smiled back but a bitter smile, the way to the arcade wasn't long that's why we arrived quickly. When we entered the arcade it doesn't have any customers like kt was only rented for the two of us, now we get tons of coins because Daniel Hyung is hella rich.

We started playing games, shooting games, we even battled to the basketball arcade which I won, and other arcade games, I was happy and I'm smiling and it's because of Daniel Hyung, I think I'm on a very huge debt now.

The last one we tried is the photo booth, we designed so colorful in our frame that makes our photo cringe but it was worth it, our little arcade tour has ended so he insisted that he'll take me home, I wanted to refuse but he will insist if I did that.

"Hyung thank you for tonight." I smiled looking outside the window of the car watching the view and the stars.

"No problem" he simply answered, then even our conversation died, he take me home and say a farewell to Daniel Hyung he even said that I should be the one who's treating next time, making me say yes even though I'm so broke now.

Yet I saw this guy in front of the building sitting in the waiting, why is he here,

Guanlin just why?

This guy really make things uncomfortable, I'm really getting tired, I'm tired.

---🚬

Double update cause why not, right?

deonie🚬