Liv's POV
It was just another bad night with the headphones in, and scissors by my side. But tonight I let myself think, more than I should have. Every single thing I did wrong. Including the time I missed a catch in the softball game last week. I turn my music up a bit louder. I sit back and look up at my white ceiling. The thought that killed me the most is knowing that my best friend, Alex, was in the hoapital. Yeah, dying. He was like me. Depressed. But these nights caught up to him. And I couldn't help him. Another mistake, another cut. I needed to let this pain out. I grab my scissors, the sharpest thing in my room. Tears start making their way down my face. I promised myself that is I cut it would be hidden, where no one would find it. I start on the left side of my left thigh and drag it across my thigh. I go slow but not too slow, just enough to feel the pain. I'm so numb right now all I do is watch the blood drip down onto my green sheets of my queen sized bed. If my mom were to ask what the blood was from I would just say I had a nose bleed.
My mom is usually never home, I still love her with all my heart, I'm an only child and my dad as well as my sister passed away when I was 11 years old in a car accident. We live in a neighborhood in Woodbridge, Virginia. Which leaves me alone here most of the time. However, I'm 16 and my mom thinks I can handle being alone for some time. I had to get a job to, well, literally survive and I just recently got a job at a local ice cream shop. Since school will be out in less than a month I'll be surrounded by the ice cream for about four hours everyday. It's pretty tempting.
I jolt out of my daydream when I hear the garage door open. I totally forgot it's Thursday. I quickly get up and run across the hall into the bathroom. I lock both doors and wad up a bunch or tissues. I wipe of the still wet blood as quickly as possible.
"You in there Livy?" She asks. I can hear her excitment.
"Yeah, just give me a minute." I say. My voice turning out a but shaky.
"Okay honey, just meet me in the family room, I have something for you." She say he voice trailing off, I can hear her footsteps going downstairs.
Once I know she is gone, I walk out of the bathroom and grab two, rather large, bandages. I put them on the cut. Then, after I put on my bulky, fluffy black pajama pants. I finally make my way downstairs.
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After my mom and I were done talking all about her trip and how I was( which took about an hour), I told her I needed to rest because I had school tomorrow.
I get up into my bed room and check the cut. It was mostly dry. I throw away the bandages and crawl into bed. I check my clock, 10:21. I will probably have at least six hours of sleep. I of course grab my phone and go on twitter. I first check Matthew Espinosa's page. He tweeted about seven times today. Impressive.
Matthew is another story, he makes me smile when no one else can. He makes me feel less alone.
I go back to my timeline after favoriting every one of those seven tweets.
After about 11 minutes I realize my eyes are burning. Most likely because I'm in the dark and I've been staring at my phones screen, it happens a lot. My addiction with twitter is beyond normal.
I slowly start to close my eyes and try to sleep. It worked I start to drift of after looking at my clock. 10:47.
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Save Me -a Matthew Espinosa Fanfic-
FanfictionTrust me, I know how it feels. I know how it hurts. I know you cry I the shower so no one will hear your screams. I know you wait until everyone falls asleep to fall apart. It's not always easy but I know exactly what it feels like.