Love Me Anyway (A student-teacher relationship)

Chapter Seventeen

Finally I upload. That break was horrible, sorry, but I do like this chapter. Maybe not worth such a long break, but whatever.

Picture of Oshi. But you don't even know who that is yet....

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I don't know how his ceiling looked so much different than mine. I mean, they were the same, generic white color. It's not like there was some sort of huge distinction between ceilings, but even in the dark room, it was completely different. Maybe it wasn't the ceiling at all, but the fact that I knew he was right outside. I could hear the laugh track of whatever stupid sitcom he was watching quite clearly through the walls. It wasn't like they were thin walls or anything, but somehow the sound was carrying all the way to me. Or maybe my hyper-active mind was fabricating things from nothing.

That's what I had been doing lately, right? Even though I had tried not to, I had had myself convinced that somehow Josh, my teacher, liked me. I had my self convinced that that (almost) kiss might have meant something, that it might have turned into something if I hadn't ran. But he regretted it, of course. He was probably just caught up in the moment or something. I mean, that happened to people all the time, right? Getting lost enough in meaningful words to make something of absolutely no meaning at all happen. It had happened to me more than once in the past.

But that look he would get in his eyes sometimes... well it seemed real. Or it just seemed real to me, because I wanted it to be.

Not that that made any difference.

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I didn't really remember when I fell asleep. I didn't even feel like I did, really. I was just as tired as I was last night (if not more so) but there was a gap of at least three hours missing from my memory. The house was completely silent, but the weak winter light coming in through the window said that the world outside was already awake.

The house was pleasantly warm for an early October morning, that perfect temperature that makes you want to drift off with an empty head and a full stomach. Despite the lulling warmth though, my head was full and my stomach empty, the second being what drove me out of the bed. I opened the door to the room silently, praying that Josh was still asleep and I would go unnoticed on my way to find the bathroom.

I found my way easily, but in a constant fear that the next room I checked would be Josh's. I house was as quiet as ever around me, and I felt as if I was intruding when the soft wheeze of my breathing interrupted the silence. Looking at my rumpled clothes, I really wished that I had grabbed my bag from the living room, but at least I looked half decent. As naked as I felt without my eyeliner, I was happy that I hadn't worn any, because it would have made a huge mess. The little I had on was smudged around my eyes in a semi-good, smoky look. I ran my fingers through my hair, ridding it of an amount of frizz and tangles. Pleased enough with that, I headed for my clothes.

My steps were still cautious, still afraid that I would run into Josh, but I still had no problem. It would be just perfect if I could be gone before he woke up, and then I wouldn't have to see him until Monday.

Luck though, was not on my side.

I got dressed, a bit of a hassle with the cast on my hand, but manageable, and got out of the room. He was sitting in the living room, and there was no way I was getting out of the house without catching his notice. He lounged over the couch, his legs kicked up on one of the arms, crossed at the ankles. It was the first time I had seen him in anything other than the professional clothes he wore to school, but he really didn't look that different. It was actually funny, the way he could look the same in nice clothes as he did in frumpy, lazy clothes. He tipped his head over the arm of the couch, eying my upside-down, with a hopeful smile. His hair went everywhere, some of it somehow managing to defy gravity and stay in his eyes. He looked absolutely amazing, with the small smile and tired, but lively eyes, but I didn't smile back.