The Opposite of Falling Apart [Formerly Three and a Half Good Legs]

Brennan and Anxiety

I've gotten mixed feelings about Brennan's anxiety in the comments. A lot of people relate...and a few people find her frustrating.

She is frustrating sometimes. Because (spoiler alert for those who don't already know) anxiety is frustrating for the anxious person and all the people around the anxious person.

For me, like Brennan, anxiety made me very self-focused. I may not have actually thought this word for word but, subconsciously, I felt like I had it worse than everyone else, no one had any way of knowing what I was going through, and no one could understand and help me.

Even though in the moment I may have thought that was true (because in the moment it truly feels like you're drowning) how wrong I was.

It took me a while to get there, and it took Brennan a while to get there... get to realizing that I can't blame everything on my anxiety, that I still have a choice. For example, if I missed a class because I was feeling sick to my stomach, I would blame anxiety for the sick feeling and therefore, blame it for skipping the class. Now, however, when I go to class even if I feel nervous-sick, I am very aware that I had the choice to decide to come in, and it was my own fault if I let anxiety win and didn't go.

Anxiety is a very tough thing, for everyone involved. It's a struggle for the people who care about the anxious person, as much as, but in a different way than, it is a struggle for the anxious person themselves.

I want to encourage people with anxiety to look for help, because there is help out there. I'm not saying go out and take meds if you're not comfortable with that. I personally tried meds, and they made me sick to my stomach. Considering that when I was nervous I felt nauseated and afraid of throwing up, I didn't like that very much. So I looked for other coping methods like setting a schedule for myself and sticking to a routine. I distract myself in class by focusing fully on taking notes. It takes practice, but you can do it without meds if you want to. And if you want to take meds, do that. There's a lot you can find simply by googling tips for dealing with anxiety. You'll find what has worked for a lot of different people, and maybe something that worked for one of them, no matter how obscure, might work for you.

Talk to someone, as well. Don't let friends and family or significant others be pushed away like Brennan tried to do with Jonas. Explain your anxiety to them. Don't be ashamed of it, but also don't use it as an excuse in your relationship. Also understand that they have problems and concerns too, and your anxiety doesn't negate those. They are an entirely different person with entirely different battles to fight.

And if you're one of the people who's in a relationship with an anxious person, be it as a significant other, sibling, parent, friend, etc...Thank you for sticking with them. I know I myself relied a lot on my family, especially my mom, sometimes more than I should have (sometimes a lot more than I should have). And you people mean the world to us anxious ones.

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If you are suffering from anxiety, I would suggest finding people who will support you and help you. I would also recommend checking out the ADAA's Anxiety and Depression Support group. An app you can download is called "SAM" can help provide distractions during an anxiety attack and help you track and manage your anxiety. It is available on the app store or Google Play.