Bad News From The Zones, Tumbleweeds

Cleric's Confession

Original Characters POV

They walk inside leaving me alone with Jet and Kid. As they both spoke I could feel Kid's eyes on me, I'm a fraud and he knows it's my fault he's dead. I spent part of the day talking to Jet in the car, begging him to ask Kid to forgive me, to explain my change of heart to him. But Jet was confused saying he didn't know what I was talking about. I was going to tell them everything.

OC I don't think I meant to stop taking the tablets when I did. Maybe I did, I don't think so. Korse told me over and again not to underestimate the Killjoys; find them, kill them, by any means possible. Why me? I was colder than any Exterminator, faster, deadlier, and more vicious. The tablets don't take all emotion, just the happy parts. Korse has anger he clings to, that's how he functions. I didn't have that. I was dead inside. Korse had killed me and turned me into a cold killer. Jet, you resurrected me. You gave me life, taught me love and belonging. In my joy and happiness, I let you both die. Kid you suspected I wasn't what I said I was and you were right. But you have to know that by then I was already falling in love with Jet and I decided you weren't going to die by my hand. I promised Jet I'd protect you three and I failed in protecting you. I am sorry. More than you will ever know. I will make this right. I have decided I'm going to tell your brothers what happened and the truth about me and then I'm going back to Battery City and kill Korse. But before I do, I'm going to blow up the tablet factories. I will keep your brothers safe.

The story I told in the car was true. When the Ritalin Rats had me they were going to sell me back to Korse, I bolted and ran but the Dracs found me. I was locked in a room with no windows, no furniture and no light. I was kept there for ages. Sometimes they brought food and water but in the beginning I didn't eat. Then I was to weak to eat, they played a recording over and over. It was Korse saying I belonged to him, I was going to be the best Exterminator ever, cold and meticulous, I was born to be a killer. When I was taken from the room I was moved to Korse's place, it was another locked room. He fed me three times a day; I wasn't strapped down to the bed but I could hardly move. He - he was nice to me. He spoke softly and always complimenting me saying I was going to be his greatest creation, he couldn't wait to teach me, he'd be my family. I never fully believed him but by then I couldn't fight against it anymore. Once I had my strength back, training began. Hours and hours each day of hand to hand combat, BLI policy and procedure; I could recite the books verbatim. At night, Korse would sit on my bed and tell me his dream of cleansing the world, destroying all contraband, and bringing order. He really hates you guys, the few encounters he's had with you really fuel his hatred. I don't know why exactly but when it comes to you four, he is absolutely crazed. He said by removing the broken and unruly we'd be the saviors of the world. Together, he always said we'd be together - like I no longer was me, I was a we with him. He controlled my every move in the city. He always scheduled my days, packed them so full that I never had a moment to question him or anything. Everyone at BLI views me as his puppet, maybe I was. But I'm not now. He was the first person I saw when I woke up and the last before going to sleep. I had freedom within his parameters. Only a few knew that I was Cleric, oh everyone knew the name and was afraid of me. But few knew it was Cleric passing them in the halls. Even then they shied away from me, barely speaking to me out of fear of Korse; they assumed I was his play toy. While he was too free with hugs and always seemed to find a reason to have his hand on me; my shoulder, my arm, my waist he ne-never pushed it beyond that. But I knew he wanted to. I could see it in his eyes and it scared me.

I had a talent for weapons. Korse practically beamed when I took out all my targets on the range, it was my first time holding a gun. I had been trained on the how to's and details for each one. Every weapon I touched, I knew instantly how to operate, how best to aim, how to destroy. I became the youngest and first girl in the S.C.A.R.E.C.R.O.W. program. To my knowledge no other girl has been tapped and no one younger then I was at the time.