As You Lie Awake

CHAPTER 5: WHAT LOVE IS

Chapter 5: What Love Is

I slowly opened my eyes and found myself inside an emergency room. No machine connected to me. Wala rin akong nararamdamang masakit sa katawan ko and... oh, there was a bump at the side of my head, probably when I hit the pavement. Napadako ang tingin ko sa lalaking nakaupo sa gilid ko. He was sleeping while sitting, his head was placed against the wall.

It was Semper. He got a bruised face, but I was the one on bed. We're supposed to trade positions. Dahan-dahan akong gumalaw. I leaned closer to him and closely examined his face. He was close to perfection, alright. But only if his eyes are a little bit lively. Sayang kasi ang makapal niyang kilay, it would be best if it was placed above lively eyes rather than a lackluster one.

His nose was pointed, that everyone would be envy, even me. His skin neither white nor dark. Just the right combination. Mapula rin ang kanyang labi na mas naging kapansin-pansin dahil sa sugat. I wonder if he would flinch if I will touch his wounded face. Wait, why am I always assessing his physical features?

"Do you really have to be that close?"

Bigla na lamang siyang nagsalita na ikinagulat ko. I almost jumped out of bed in surprise! His eyes were still close, and he didn't move even a little.

"Hindi ka ba tulog?" I blurted out to hide my embarrassment.

"Hindi."

"Eh bakit ka nakapikit?" I asked. His eyes were still closed, which gave me a view of how thick his lashes are. Damn, I don't need mascara with those lashes.

"I'm enduring the physical pain," sagot niya. Ibinuka niya ang kanyang mga mata at tumingin sa akin ng diretso. And now it came to my mind!

"You tried to kill me!" I started hitting him with my curled fist, but he caught my hand. Sinubukan kong makawala at nagtagumpay naman ako kaya pinagpatuloy ko ang paghahampas sa dibdib niya. He didn't flinch or move, hinayaan niya lang ako ngunit napapangiwi siya sa ginawa ko. I continue hitting him until I felt my own fist to throb.

"Pwede ba huminahon ka muna saglit?" Kalmado man ang boses niya, it is still very dominating. Natagpuan ko na lamang ang sarili ko na naging kalmado gaya ng iniutos niya.

"Hindi kita pinagtangkaang patayin," wika niya. It sounds convincing but I won't believe him.

"You did."

I heard him sigh and pulled his hair. "It wasn't me."

"Hindi ako naniniwala." It was a lie. Naniniwala akong hindi nga siya iyon, but the fact that he was the one who brought me there, the motorcycle, the outfit. It all points to him. But... why do I find myself contradicting my belief?

"Listen, Violet." And so, I did. Damn, why do I follow his instructions? "Hindi kita tinangkang patayin. In fact, I was the one who saved you."

My eyes met his but it's hard to tell if there's sincerity or none in his eyes. Nevertheless, I believed him. "Kung hindi ikaw, sino?"

"Aalamin ko pa. I have a hunch, but I cannot tell you for now." Napangiwi siya nang bahagya siyang gumalaw. "My body hurts so much. So, this is physical pain."

"Aren't you supposed to be treated?" tanong ko sa kanya. Fine, nag-aalala ako. If he saved me, I would also return the favor. May ilang galos sa siko at braso niya.

"Hindi pwede."

"Bakit hindi?"

"I just don't want to," wika niya at ini-stretch ang katawan. "I will naturally heal for a day or two. Humans are weak, hindi ko akalaing ganito pala ang sakit na nararamdaman ninyo."