Stomach Tied In Knots ( A Boy's Life - Sequel )

VIII. Just A Bestfriend

(( A: Hi. This chap was a disaster. I've written a long chap on my tab but when I checked it on my laptop it wasn't saved. The next thing I know, the chapter I've written was gone. So sorry if it'd be messy. Especially the part where the poses should've been explained. And I took so long to update so, sorry. This kind of things make me depressed .-. And wattpad changed the rate of this to Restricted again. So be warned.))

[Naru's POV:]

"Ne... Naru."

Shit. I feel like crying already. The atmosphere is choking me.

"About you being my bestfriend..." He continued. Avoiding my gaze that's stuck on his pained expression.

"Sorry." He said in a remorseful tone.

I just wish he'd say that he still wants me as a bestfriend. C'mon Kise, say it. Let me be your friend. Even if my hair has grown longer than your bestfriend... please, let me be a friend. Please.

"You're not my bestfriend anymore."

I gulped the clump forming inside my throat. I want to cry already. Goddamn it.

So that mean we can never be something more or less. We're just co-workers.

"I'm sorry." He said as he looked back at my eyes.

I missed this guy. I missed him so much. My heart hurts that when we have finally met again, he stood before me and said he doesn't need me as a friend anymore.

I wanted to hug him, jump at him, touch him or even kiss him. I just want him at the moment. But I stopped myself because I know my place. We left each other broken in the past few years.

We couldn't just go back to the start and fix our relationship that easy.

It could never be fixed. We would just both get hurt and bleed if we try to pick up the pieces together and build it again.

Fixing this shit is just impossible. It's just fucked up in so many ways.

I blinked the tears forming inside my eyes away and looked at the other direction.

I smiled as I said, "Yeah. I understand."

He exhaled, he's been holding it, I guess. Maybe he's afraid that zi might cry and sob and wail just like back then.

But no, I learned how to conceal my feelings. Specially made by the best make up a girl can wear... A smile. //wink

"Saa, let's go now? We need to prepare for the shoot." Kise asked me and pointed at the door.

I gave him a nod and said, "Sure. you go first. I'll stay here a little more."

He made an investigating look at me. Thinking that I want him to go away at the moment so I can cry by myself.

I chuckled, "Kise. You go now. I just want silence. Tori would hit me if I don't arrive on time so don't worry." I assured him.

"Okay. So, later." He walked off towards the door and left.

I faced the direction where the wind was blowing and let it touch me freely. I want to be free right now.

Free from stress, depression, anxiety... Just free from this cruel world.

Away from this bullshit called reality.

I hugged my knees close to me and inhaled deeply.

I need to calm down or else I'd cry. And I hate crying.

"Ah~" I sighed and stretched my limbs out.

"How boring can your life be, Naru? I'm tired of all your shits, bullshits, and drama." I scolded my self.