The Frozen Tear

3

I walked in the dreary darkness towards the dim light fallen on an empty bench by the street lamp. I sat down solemnly. I could not feel the previous piercing cold. My mind was filling with an never-ending chain of thoughts. What has happened miles off from my home and, what is happening right now in my own home? Seeing my mum enduring a punishment I knew so well made me feel strange. I could not really grasp the situation nor could I grasp what I felt or witnessed. Debt. I heard the word, 'debt'. What debt? Owe money? Or Owe something else? I had left the house, leaving my mother to deal with her own clients. I did not want to witness the real horror. 

'Ray must be walking real slow', I thought as I waited. As soon as the thought passed over my head, I saw Ray's figure, walking slowly in the dark. He was watching his steps as he walked. I waved at him, the moment he lifted his head to search the roadside benches for me. He walked quickly over to my bench and sat down. 

His father had mailed the divorced papers and, Ray had been the unlucky one to find them first. He had left the papers on the kitchen counter and left home. He did not know how his mother felt and, if she would sign the papers. He wanted to hate her if she did sign them but, he also felt that his mother might deserve the relief, the break, the end. 

I listened to him, vaguely recalling the legal procedures myself. They were not vivid memories. I was only seven back then. I told him, not to bother too much about it since, it was after all, his parents' life. It was a decision based on their happiness. His life was not meant to go down because of a decision his parents made. His happiness should still be there though things might get rough from here on. 

We talked for a long time and I could not feel the time passing but, all of a sudden I heard a loud thud from behind. It felt distant but strong. It came from my home. When I looked at Ray, I saw his head, turned back and his eyes searching for the whereabouts of the sound

. "What was that? Did you hear it?"

"Yeah"

Ray did not know anything about my family, except for the fact that, my parents were divorced. Tonight I did not feel the usual urge to hide away, to stack away the load. 

"My mum must be having a hard time with that old man"

"What old man?"

Ray's brown eyes were searching mine. I stared back at him, letting him dive into these pools with drowned mysteries. I could see his face changing, from its gloom to a look of concern. Concerned. No one has been concerned about these things. They always seemed never to notice. 

I smiled but, behind my smile was a question. 

Should I tell him? 

I looked at his brown eyes again. I was looking at his face for a long time, drowned in thought. He seem to know the question I was trying to answer. He did not say a single word and waited for me to start. 

I took a deep breath...

"I should have known", he finally said. I could see his guilty face, now focused and in thought, completely strayed away from the depression it once showed. He was staring solemnly at the ground. I smiled and nudged him. "Cheer up! You've been gloomy all day", I said cheerfully. He looked at me and smiled. 

"I never knew you to be this strong. How can you even smile right now?", Ray's eyes were resting on my smile.

"Things are never easy but, we just have to take them easy"

I looked up at the sky and, I knew that he too was thinking the same thing. I felt connected. I felt like I finally existed. 

"Sorry I was not a friend to you all this time... a true friend"

I looked at him and, I could see his guilt. I wanted it gone, wiped away from those eyes. I looked again at the star filled sky and said;

"You know, there is a reason why I say that you're my only friend"