Doug is extremely upset now, more than he was when his kids died, obviously. He decided he wanted to have a funeral for Pugg, the Mabeline FitMe foundation he had just stolen from work a few nights ago. He shoved the foundation down the dishwasher disposal, crying out, "OH my friend Pugg, you were great to me. aWOOO WOOO Woo woooo. You were always there when I need to tell gossip about the cute girls at my school." (Hey) Now, you're (an All Star) probably confused, but Doug didnt finish 3rd grade, and he retook school from there, and he has crushes on multiple 7 and 8 year old girls. Weirdo.
While he is crying over his dead friend, his wife stumbles in, obviously on mushrooms, asking if Doug wants chinese food. "Nah just pick me up some *sniff* plain biscuits. THOSE WERE PUGG'S FAVORITE. aWOOOO WOOOO Wooo woo." "Shut the hell your mouth Princess Douggy." She says this and leaves to get food, and a knock comes at the door.
Doug opens the door and there stands flock of wild Jehovah's Witnesses, 57 of them to be exact. As soon as he opens the door, they flooded into the house as fast as the anchovies took over the Krusty Krab. All of them were screaming in sync, "DO YOU HAVE TIME TO TALK ABOUT OUR LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST?" While this is happening a huge truck pulls up. And its full of 6,999,999,999.1 dollars worth of makeup, the normal amount he tends to spend. But he doesn't notice that his wife already got back from "Ching Chong Wing Wong Food Eatty Eatty Fatso" and was eating all the food, sitting in the driveway. He sees her now, but she doesn't see the ginormous bid ol' truck pulling in and she starts to get squished by the tires. Doug doesn't say anything, he just stares at her. Then she notices him there on the front porch as she is screaming out in pain, spewing out chinese food and fat. No blood. "HEY HELP ME OUT HERE." Nothing from Doug. Just silence. As shes dying out there, she says her final words:
"You are about to enter the courtroom of Judge Judith Sheindlin. The people are real. The cases are real. The rulings are final. This is her courtroom. This is Judge Judy..."
YOU ARE READING
Doug
ParanormalThis is an exciting fast paced novel with many twists and turns. Doug and his family go through a series of struggles that lead to one thing after another, as an apocalypse happens turning Doug from a broken marriage to being with the love of his li...
