Taste of Poison

Chapter Eighteen: The Truth

 The little bitch,/ She went and she told a lie/ Now she will never tell another/ A lie/ The little bitch,/ She went and she told a lie/ Never fucking lie to me – The Game by Disturbed

Zamiel was quiet as I made him a sandwich. He didn't let me know what he wanted so I just made him something simple. I'm confident that he won't hurt me since he's in some serious pain right now. He's in the living room laying on the floor with both of his hands on top of his stomach where I stabbed him.

I told him that I was trying to help him, but I don't think he believes me. I did tell him that I told the cops. I didn't lie to him, and I didn't keep anything from him.

He's been quiet ever since and that was an hour ago.

I hand him his sandwich on a small platter, and he takes it without looking at me. He tries to sit up, and when he winces in pain, I jump up to help him but he glares at me.

"I don't need your fucking help," he snaps coldly.

I freeze as I let my arms drop to my sides. "I'm sorry," I tell him.

We sit in silence as he eats, and when he finishes, he looks over at me but he wasn't really looking directly at me. He was just looking in my direction as I sit on the couch adjacent from him.

"Why do you want to help me so bad? Do you just not want to see in me prison or what?" he asks coldly.

My lips press together tightly before I answer. "I just want to help you. You don't belong in prison, Zamiel."

He scoffs. "Stop lying to yourself. Why the fuck do you want to help me, Pia? I can't hurt you. You can tell me the fucking truth. You've been honest with everyone else but your own damn self. Why do you want to help me?"

I didn't say anything for a while because he was right. I have been lying to myself. I want to help him because I care about him.

I want to help him because I love him, and I don't want to admit it because I don't think Zamiel is capable of love.

"I want to help you because I love you," I admit quietly.

He doesn't look surprised. He doesn't look anything. Actually, his face is pretty straightforward and blank. For a couple of moments, he doesn't say anything either. Finally, however, he looks at me. He looks me straight in the eyes and holds it for a paused moment.

I don't expect him to say it back. Actually, I would be pretty surprised if he did. It would definitely be nice, but like I said, I don't think Zamiel is even capable of loving someone.

My heart is beating fast. Even if it's just seconds of him looking at me, it feels like hours before he says something.

"I've had people tell me that they loved me, but you..." he trails off as he keeps looking me straight in the eyes. "You are the first one that I actually believe."

ZAMIEL

I don't really know what to say to Pia right now. I feel betrayed. I feel like she left me for the wolves, and I seriously can't get out of this one. I could run, but they will follow. If I do run, I'll be all over the news.

My face will be on every fucking TV screen in America, and I don't like the sound of that.

And it's all Pia's fault.

When that cop took her away, I could have ran, but the stab wound... Shit, I really needed a doctor. Even now after the surgery, I have no painkillers. And my God, it fucking hurts like a bitch right now.