The Holy Pencil Bible

The Great Flood

So.

Life was good in the Lands Major. Pencarl and Dixon were relatively fine, if not downright neighborly. Calculisa was assumingly living her life somewhere in Far Off, without a care in the world. Calculatori was still getting a severe reprimanding for killing her daughter. I mean, you can't put her in jail, because the Gods still need her for Algebra class. 

Calculaura was still dead.

Overall, everything was finally calm. 

Of course, that couldn't last!

This problem came in the form of the Great Flood. The Greeks, Romans, and Egyptians all had their versions of a great flood. Even the Catholics found a way to squeeze it in there with Noah's Ark. In the Pencilian Bible, it was a spilled water bottle. 

The spill was, of course, coming from D Land. Pencarl was on a visit because they were frenemies, and frenemies have tea every once and a while. The Gods were drinking irresponsibly when the water bottle was tipped over. Only a tiny spill was left, but when you're a pencil, that's basically a tsunami. 

As the wave approached the math paper that Dixon called home, they were catching up on the latest news. 

"Did you hear about that gang lord Ticonderoga? I heard he was put in the pen yesterday."

Pencarl was shocked. "Really? How long do you think his sentence will be?" 

"A long period of time, I hope," was Dixon's only reply. 

Looking out the window, Pencarl gasped. "Water!" 

They looked out the window in horror. Together, they ran out of the house. However, nowhere was safe. It would flood D Land. It would flood V Land. Life as they knew it was now over. 

"We need a ship!" Dixon yelled. 

They ran towards the docks, as Pencarl muttered under his breath, "I have a sinking feeling aboat this..." 

As they neared the docks, a rope was quickly unwinding from a pile. The last boat was leaving. As fast as they were running, there was no way they would be able to catch up. 

As they reached where the beach met the wood of the docks, the last of the rope slipped off the end and trailed behind the leaving boat. 

"No! Come back!" Dixon yelled fruitlessly after the boat. However, it was too late. He turned defeatedly back towards Pencarl. "What now?"

Pencarl scratched his eraser for a moment, before getting an idea. "I have something, but it might sound crazy..." 

Dixon looked up hopefully. "You have a boat?" 

Pencarl replied, "More like a raft... and it's technically not mine..." 

They ran off, with Pencarl in the lead. As they went further and further inland, Pencarl only got more and more confused. At last, he had the guts to ask, "Where are we going?" before the pair turned into a lot with a wrought iron gate. Pencarl didn't have time to fully read the sign, as the water was getting closer, but it looked like...

"Cemetery?!?!" 

Pencarl slowed down to search the area, before setting off again. They got to a grave, and Pencarl hurriedly said, "Help me dig!" 

The gravestone said "Calculaura: Lived 2016-2016." 

"We're digging up your daughter," Dixon said in shock. 

"Pencarl paused digging for a moment. "She's the closest thing to a raft we have and I'd rather not die. Now, are you going to help me or not?"

Dixon thought for a moment, before crouching on the ground and starting to dig. 

As the water came closer, the two dug more and more urgently. After a couple minutes, her body was above ground. Without a second to spare, Pencarl and Dixon climbed on, and the water rushed towards them. 

"Brace!" Dixon screamed. 

The water hit Calculaura hard, but she held up. For the next hour or so, waves pounded and crashed into the calculator, but Dixon and Pencarl stayed alive. Barely. 

As the last hopes of this flood ending were fading away, the Magical Reverse-Cloud came down from the sky and took all the water away. 

Dixon and Pencarl were coughing up water, but thankfully on the ground. As the boats came back, the pair greeted the residents with cheery "Welcome back!" and the occasional "Hey, weren't you the one on the boat that left us?" 

The people of The Lands came back, and rebuilt their houses. Pencarl re-buried his daughter. And all was well.

So hey, I'm not dead, just colossally lazy.