Dear Future Someone (BWWM)

Before we met

Hi, this is my first story, lyk ever. It just popped out of nowhere and i decided to write it. Thank you for taking your time to read this, and i wouldn't mind a vote or two if you few nice enough.

hope you like it, cheers

                            *****

I've fallen in love once.

Or was it twice? probably Thrice? 

humph..... am not so sure i can count the times anymore.

They say that we don't look for love, and that love finds us. 

That it hits us like a bullet to the head.

Bang!

Dear old Cupid with his arrow, who could dodge him at his best!

They say love is unconditional and pure... which I beg to defer when its as rare as Hailey's comet. 

But i grow up on that: believing in love.

Well at least Disney's version of it: so simple and effortless you'd think its perfectly normal for a man and woman to look at each other for the first time and say to themselves:

"Wow, that's the one"

so flawless

And wow did i believe! If i could open up a new religion on it, i would be filthy rich! But wait, am pretty sure big Mouse got that covered. 

And life... oh life, eventually found a way to stump out all that innocence out of me by the time i hit high school. 

Even in my self-professed single-dom, I couldn't help myself and secretly wait and hope.

That maybe one day i'd find my own,

That maybe that special someone would walk into my eye sight, make me catch my breath and swear to live for them in each and every single way. 

But surprise surprise, cause when it did, it came with a price, that left me in more debt than I could pay . 

How many of us have purposely changed ourselves to get someone's attention: in the way we talk, the way we walk, the way we eat, the way we dress, the way we think, the way we live?

How many of us have given up something to be with that one person, that made you so convinced that they were the proverbial 'one'? 

Because they were so good at telling you all the right things, did the right things, showed you the right things, make you believe in 'right' things, only to realize they were never inclusive of you to begin with. 

How many of us have stopped being us just for that one person? Simply because we believe that if we are anything else they would never love us? 

How many of us later realize that their just human, and that we can't help ourselves to want what we want. And all our want is to be: loved, appreciated and understood by someone who has no familial or platonic ties to you at all. 

We're just human.......

but is it worth it?

I know i sound cynical, but am not cynical about love, no, am cynical of what we believe it stands for. 

I once heard that love is not destructive, steal, aimless, proud, envious, self-seeking nor does it keep records of wrongs. 

It protects, it trusts, it hopes, it builds and it preservers through the sunshine and the storm.