The Ghost

Chapter 6: Walking at your side

Guy and Marian were still talking when Matilda knocked at the door.
The healer entered the room, and Marian stood up. The girl glanced at Guy with a pang of guilt, and she saw a veil of sadness falling on his face.
"You have to go," he said, and she nodded.
"I should better go back to the camp, they'll be worried for my absence..."
"I doubt it," Matilda intervened, "I heard that Robin caused a great commotion in Nottingham last night."
"What happened?" Marian asked, and even Guy was curious to know.
"I heard that the sheriff had hired a killer to infiltrate in Robin's gang, but they could bring him on their side and they robbed the sheriff with his help."
Guy scoffed.
"I knew that that Carter wasn't trustworthy. What did he do?"
Matilda grinned.
"He was sent to kill Robin, so they faked Robin's death. That man took his 'body' to the castle, and when they were in the sheriff's room, Robin 'came back to life' and robbed him."
Guy rolled his eyes.
"Didn't anyone think to check if he was actually dead? I'd have severed his head from his body, just to be sure."
"Guy!" Marian turned to him in horror, and Guy averted his eyes.
"Sorry, but it would have been common sense to check if an enemy is really dead before introducing him into the heart of the castle."
"What he said may be unpleasant, but he has a point," Matilda commented, and Guy looked at her, surprised to hear that the healer was defending him.
Marian sighed.
"I suppose you are right. But I wish you wouldn't be on the side of the sheriff, Guy."
"Marian?" Guy looked at her and sighed, sadly. "What I'm going to say might be considered betrayal, I could hang for it, but I won't kill Hood, if I can avoid it. I don't like him, I never will, and I won't cry if he dies during one of his insane plans to bring havoc in the castle, but for you, only for you, I won't have his blood on my hands. I won't inflict any more sorrow on you, it's my promise to you."
Marian hugged him tight, moved by his words, and they remained close for a while, then Marian opened her eyes to meet his gaze, putting a hand on his cheek, tenderly.
For a moment she felt the urge to kiss him, to clear away the sadness in his eyes, but she immediately dismissed the idea as a folly that would surely end up hurting both of them. Instead she smiled at him affectionately.
"I want another promise from you," she said.
"Name it."
"Be safe. I'd suffer if anything bad should happen to you."
Guy smiled back at her.
"I'll try. Go, now. If Hood comes to search for you here, we'd end up fighting and I'm afraid that neither of us would come out of it unscathed."
Marian planted a kiss on his cheek, then she went away. Guy followed her with his gaze and stared at the empty door of the room until he realized the Matilda was looking at him with an amused smirk on her face.
"Stop staring at me, witch," he snarled, mostly to hide his embarrassment.
"I see that you are feeling better," Matilda said, moving to close the door, "back to your nasty self, I see."
"So what? Are you going to get leeches, now?"
Matilda laughed.
"Do you know, Sir Guy? I don't think you are so terrible, after all. Not when you are on your own, anyways. What you said... That you aren't going to kill Robin, was it true?"
The knight sighed.
"If I kill him, Marian would hate me, she couldn't forgive me for that. I have no choice... I never have choices," he added, bitterly.
Matilda glanced at him for a moment, then she sat on the edge of the bed and patted his hand, affectionately.
"Now, now, my boy, don't be so tragic. Maybe you are not in the best situation at the moment, but I think that your life can improve if you really want it."
"How?"
"You could begin by understanding what would make you happy..."
"Marian!" He blurted, interrupting Matilda, and the healer shook her head.
"You shouldn't build your happiness on a single person. Not even on material things, because you can always lose them and then you'd be left with nothing."
"I can't stop loving her, no matter what, God knows that I tried."
Matilda was a little surprised to hear that heartfelt confession, and she guessed that the knight was so lonesome that he rarely had the chance to confide his feelings to anyone.
"It's a different thing, Sir Guy. Nobody says that you should stop loving her, it would be a folly to think that you can change your feelings when they are so strong. But you can live a satisfying, happy life even without her love."
"I don't know how."
"I never said it's easy, but it's possible. Everyone must find his own path to happiness, and there are many paths that lead nowhere, but I'm sure that if you keep trying, in time you can do it. I can give you a simple suggestion to begin: take your distances from the sheriff. That man is evil, following him blindly won't lead you anywhere."
"It's not that easy. I can't stop working for him, he'd never allow me to be free."
Matilda thought for a moment before answering.
"Well, that's another reason to avoid killing or arresting Robin Hood, don't you think? If you can't get rid of the sheriff, he might solve the problem for you. Robin wants to free England from his oppression, he might end up freeing you too."
"I doubt that Hood can help me, but even if he can, until then, I still have to obey the sheriff."
Matilda nodded.
"Of course, but to work for him you don't have to trust him. If he gives you an order that you think is wrong, obey if you have no other choice, but at least try to think of the options you have, try to think of a solution, of a better way to give him what he wants. Maybe you are not used to use your brain, but I'm sure that you're not half dumb as the sheriff thinks you are. Follow your heart, if something inside you suggests that what you are going to do is wrong, then probably it is."
"He says that humanity is weakness, that it will lead me to ruin..."
Matilda snorted.
"That's because he wants to be the one to lead you to ruin, he wants a compliant slave, a pawn in his hands. Don't believe him, humanity can be your greatest strength."
Guy didn't answer: the words of the healer sounded true and sensible, but for him it wasn't easy to dismiss the loyalty he had for the sheriff.
Matilda noticed his uneasiness and she changed subject.
"Even if you are less disagreeable than I thought, I'm not here to chat, I have many other patients waiting for my help. So, how do you feel today?"
"Better."
"Did you eat anything?"
"Bread and broth this morning. Still hungry."
"No sickness at all?"
"No."
The woman smiled.
"Well, then I have something for you. It will give you strength, and it's good." She took a little jar from her bag, and she placed it on the bedside table. "Honey. You can eat it with some more bread."
Guy looked at the jar, almost in awe, and Matilda lifted an eyebrow.
"What's up? Is it the first time you see a jar of honey?"
"No, but it's the first time since I was a boy that somebody gives some to me."
Poor man, he's not used to people who take care of him, the healer thought.
"Well, enjoy it, then. Are you still cold? Let me feel your hands... No, you're not. But I bet that you are still tired."
"How do you know?"
Matilda grinned.
"I'm a healer. You will need a couple of days of rest to recover completely."
"It will be a new experience as well."
"Come on, surely sometimes you have been unwell, or injured in the last few years. I noticed that you have the scar of a burn on your arm, and it's rather recent, last year maybe. It must have been very painful."
Guy touched his arm with a little sigh. He still remembered the searing pain he had felt when the sheriff had poured acid on his tattoo.
"It was, but the sheriff didn't allow me to lose time to recover. As soon as I was able to stand, I had to get back to work."
"Well, this time I forbid it. Even if you feel better, you'll take time to rest. Now take your shirt off, I'll put some ointment on those burns."
Guy complied, and Matilda noticed how meekly he had obeyed to her command, as if he was conditioned to do what the others ordered to him.
I guess that he's so lost that he would follow anyone who looks stronger and wiser to his eyes. Too bad that he had met the sheriff.
The healer treated the burns in silence. When she finished, Guy gave her a little smile.
"If you have other people to help, go. I can be left alone now, I really am much better."
The woman nodded, a little reluctant.
"Very well, Sir Guy. Take care and try to remember my words. If you need my skills or my advice, you know where to find me. Just, don't come with your guards."
Gisborne was about to reply, when Allan came back and both Guy and Matilda stared at him, horrified: the young man had a bleeding cut on his cheek, and bruises on his face.
The healer jumped to his feet, and hurried to meet him.
"What happened to you?!"
"The sheriff," Guy said, before Allan could answer, "he didn't like to hear that I'm ill and not coming to work."
"What?! That filthy rotten pile of donkey crap!"
Matilda went close to Allan and made him sit on a chair. She took a a clean towel and dipped it in the water of the basin, beginning to clean the blood from the cut.
"He was wearing his ring," Guy said, in a tone that implied that he also knew very well that kind of treatment.
"He was furious because of Robin Hood. I heard from the guards that Robin made him kneel kicking him in the groin, and then robbed him. Giz, if I were you, I'd take my time before going back to the castle, he blames you for not being there to stop Robin. When I told him that you were ill and contagious, he began hitting me, in a rage."
Guy averted his eyes.
"I'm sorry, you had to bear the brunt of his wrath..."
Allan blinked, unused to see Gisborne worrying for his sake.
"That's alright, Giz, nothing worse than a tavern's brawl. At least this time he didn't menace to hang me."
"Maybe I should go there..." Guy began, but Matilda interrupted him.
"Are you stupid or just insane? Why should you rush to the castle to work for a man who clearly doesn't care at all about you? Anyways you can't go, even if you feel better: if you do, he'll understand that we have lied about the nature of your illness and it will be worse for all of us. Besides, you have something more important to think about."
Guy blinked.
"What?"
"The ghost. He wants you to protect Marian. Do you have any idea on how to do it?"
Guy shook his head, sadly.
"He'd want me to take her away from here, but she would never follow me."
Allan looked around, nervously.
"Is he still here?"
"Not now," Matilda answered, "I guess he followed his daughter. However," she turned back to Guy, "the best thing you can do is to recover completely and to be ready."
"Ready for what?"
"For anything. Be sure to have money and a fresh horse in case you need to run away from the county, be ready to leave the castle and the sheriff if he endangers you or Lady Marian, be ready to start a new life somewhere else, and even to let her go if her best option is to be with Robin. Be ready, and be strong."
After taking care of Allan's wounds, and giving some other advice to the two men, Matilda went away to see her other patients.
Allan took the bag he had dropped to the floor when he entered the room, and took it near the bed.
"Before going to the castle, I went to Locksley and I took some of your clean clothes. Do you need help to get changed?"
"No, I'm still a bit weak, but I'm well enough to manage on my own."
Allan nodded.
"I'm glad for this. You were in a pretty bad shape yesterday, I was worried."
"Thank you..." Guy said awkwardly, then he pointed at the jar on the bedside table. "I have some honey there. Find some bread and we'll share it."
"Really, Giz?" Allan asked almost shyly, not used at Guy trying to be friendly, and the knight smirked at him.
"Go on, hurry, I'm hungry."

Marian followed the path that lead into the heart of the forest, shadowed by tall trees, and she wished that she could see the sky. She was walking to go back to the camp, but her heart was heavy.
Now that she was alone, without the presence of Allan or Guy, she felt even more sad and lonely, and she missed her father sorely.
No more than a year ago, they were still living at Knighton, in the manor where she was born and where she grew up. She had thought to be unhappy then, that the life in the county of Nottingham was too hard, and that the oppression of the sheriff was too cruel on poor people. It was true, of course, but now she remembered those days with yearning.
Life was difficult then, Guy used to woo her, his affection unwelcome and somehow a little scary, and the Nightwatchman wasn't able to give enough relief to the poor, but her father was alive.
Maybe weak, but still the owner of his manor and his lands, a nobleman with no power, but proud of his lineage.
Marian kept drying her tears with the hands, but she couldn't stop weeping. She wanted to be strong, to hide her sorrow at the eyes of the others, but now she was alone, and she needed to cry.
She kept walking, even if her vision was blurred by tears. She knew the way to the camp, and she just wanted to get there, to be held by Robin. She wanted to be comforted, understood in her pain.
But, as she was getting closer, she began feeling a sort of oppression in her heart. She didn't like much living in the forest, with the other outlaws, and under Robin's command: that life just didn't suit her.
I have no other choice.
She burst into another bout of sobs.
Father, if only I could see you once again... I need you. I thought I didn't, but it isn't true, I do...
Marian walked under the trees, her hands on her face, brushing away the tears like she did when she was a child and she came home weeping for a scratched knee or for a little bruise, knowing that her father was always there to comfort her.
At her side, invisible to her eyes, Sir Edward's ghost followed her. His diaphanous fingers tried to dry her tears, to caress her curly hair, but she didn't feel her touch, and she couldn't notice his presence.
"Father, father, please come back," she whispered, "don't leave me alone! I need you, I need you so much!"
"I am here, my child, right at your side," the ghost said, longing to comfort her, but the girl couldn't hear his voice.