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*BRADLEY'S POV*

'Dear Diary,

It's exactly one year today since the band split up.

Not one message from any of the guys though, not that I expected any anyway.

It still kills me every single fucking day to think about all the memories I had with my best friends. If only things hadn't fucked up. Somehow it's easy to place the blame on myself. Not to mention, I miss that fluffy haired blonde more than anything right now. What actually hurts me the most though is that I know he isn't thinking about me. I despise Con and James for being able to keep their relationship for this long. They don't know how lucky they are. The last time I spoke to Con he said that Tris had gone weird, like he'd completely lost his way. Apparently, he'd cut off most people now-'

"Brad?!" I heard my Mother yell from downstairs. I dragged myself out of bed with a sigh before quickly shutting my diary and hiding it underneath my pillow.

"Yes, Mother?" I said as I walked into the kitchen.

She turned to me with worried eyes before shaking her head. "Don't you think you should get yourself out more?" She spoke, knowing damn well I'd heard this lecture three times this week already.

"And who with, exactly?" I folded my arms, looking past her out of the window. I could hear her voice slowly trailing off into the distance. I wasn't interested in what she had to say, in fact I wasn't interested in anything anymore. The only thing I liked to do now was write, and it wasn't even songs. I'd write in my diary every day, I'd write stories about anything and everything. Sometimes I'd write about life, and how I didn't understand it now - and sometimes I'd write about Tristan, even though I didn't like to think about him, but I did. All of the time.

"You could always go out with me?" My attention shot back once I heard her ask me a question.

"You? What guy wants to go out with his Mother at 21?" I watched as my Mum's face dropped.

"-No I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I just mean, I don't know." I turned away from her as I felt my throat swell up.

"Bradley, I'm worried about you." She rested her hand on my shoulder and kissed my curls.

"Well don't be." I coughed, making sure my voice didn't sound like I was about to cry, even though I was.

"Alright, well, let's order some food in tonight and we can watch some films or something, yeah?" Her voice heightened, trying to cheer me up.

"Sure, Mum." I agreed, so I could go back upstairs and continue with writing.

As soon as I got back into my room, I jumped onto my bed and grabbed my diary from where I left it. Flicking through each page to find where I left off, my heart dropped as I realised I was only a few pages away from the end of it. I really did not want to get up and leave the house for another diary, but I knew I had to. I loved writing in it, it was a way for me to get out my emotions since I had nobody to talk to.

After a while of contemplating whether I wanted to get out of bed or not, I finally began to get dressed and walk down the stairs shamefully.

"Where are you going, Brad?" My mum beamed, she almost dropped her glass once she saw me fully clothed and ready to leave the house.

"I need to get something from town." I smiled. I wouldn't tell her what though, it was pretty weird for a twenty-one-year-old man-boy to have a diary. I felt silly.

"Oh, that's good. Are you meeting anybody? Do you want me to take you?" She questioned, flapping around trying to find her keys.

"No, I'll be okay Mum. I'll see you later."

On the bus, I kept my earphones in the entire time, playing the same playlist as always, Arctic Monkeys. I knew if I kept my earphones in, nobody would try to talk to me, at least I hoped.

"Hi." I saw a young blonde guy mouth as he smiled at me. I quickly looked around to make sure he was infact talking to me and not someone beside me or something. I took both earphones out and frowned at the stranger before replying.

"Hey?"

"Arctic Monkeys?" He giggled from the seat across from me.

"Yeah, how did you know?" I felt my face burn up as I realised my music must have been way too loud.

"I can hear it. I love them, I saw them in concert last year and they were astonishing." The guy continued, his blue eyes captivating mine. He was pretty cute, I hadn't thought about boys or anything of the sort in one whole year. Not since, Tris.

"That's awesome, I'd love to see them in concert. I've been a fan for so long." I smiled, and for once it was genuine.

"Really? Me too!" The guy chuckled before standing up and taking the empty seat next to mine.

"What're you doing later?" I quickly said, without thinking. The blonde guy raised his eyebrows at me impressed and took a moment to think. I quickly regretted asking, as I knew I'd be turned down. I bet I looked a right mess, and I bet he thought I was weird to ask so soon.

"Absolutely nothing. Want to hang out?"

-

YOUR MAIN BITCH IS BACK. I hope you liked the first chapter, I know it was sad and shit but just you guys wait. I have a lot planned for this fanfic so I hope you guys enjoy it. This chapter was quite a long one but from now they're gonna be shorter so I can update more regularly.

Let me know what you thought!!!

-Ellise <3

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