lánytestvér {hungarian} >> sister
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4.
My younger sister Chloe is a ray of sunshine under all the stormy clouds.
Maybe a bit too much of sunshine, as she clambered upstairs to our bedroom. She annoyed Helena to no end each time, however it felt like a breath of fresh air for me—I hated being cooped up too long. It routinely went something like this:
Helena would shout, "Chloe! I'm telling Mom you're annoying us again!"
I would look up from my work from class to where Chloe perched on the floor with our throw pillows, bringing a book or colouring paper of sort. She would grin toothily at me, showing her latest artwork, which is admittedly amazing for someone her age. I would lean over, take my hairbrush and brush off the tangles in her yellow hair on the floor.
When I feel her getting a little sleepy into her bedtime, I take her downstairs to her bedroom, located next to Mom's. Mom usually isn't home till late these days, so I tuck her in her My Little Pony blanket, and kissed her forehead before turning her space galaxy nightlight on for her.
Today was no different, as I tucked Chloe in.
She had the audacity to laugh about Lena's procrastination on her English homework.
"I don't understand why do high schoolers pro-stat-tinate," she inquired pensievely, her chubby face scrunching in confusion, her brown eyes crinkling.
"Procrastination," I corrected, "it's a bad habit they picked up, but hey! You still have at least eight to nine years to get there!"
She smiled, propping her arms on her stuffed animals and pillows, "I still have a gazillion years. I'm six!"
I can't help but grin. It's nice knowing someone in this house can break the annoying tension going on. I pulled the covers and tucked her in bed, humouring her with checking monsters under the bed and the closet.
Before leaving the room, she asked, "Hales, why doesn't Dad come home anymore?"
I paused.
Mom and Dad had sat Lena and I down the moment they announced they separated. Dad told Chloe he would be leaving for a while, but he would come home, sometimes. The divorce just happened naturally, and we picked up the clues. Looks like Dad hasn't hold up his end of the deal for her. However, what shocked me more is the fact this is the first time she asked of Dad.
"He's on a business trip in New York, and he has to stay there for a long time," I finally said, putting on the right words.
"He'll...be back, right?" she asked so hopefully. It was hard to let her down. My older sister instincts wanted to protect her from early heartbreak and the tumultuous experience of love. "When will he be back?"
I went back over to her, kissing her forehead.
"When he would call us, I guess."
----
My father was always closer to Lena. I don't resent it, but sometimes it meant that I was more invisible to his eyes. I hardly had good memories with him, only that I felt happiest with him feeding ducks around Central Park when I was five.
He calls once every week, on our 80s styled cordless phone in the kitchen, on Thursday night. I know because Lena would get excited to tell him about her week, and would tell him so much about the car she wanted, then figuring out about her next game plan for college or her future. He would appease Chloe, his baby daughter, on the phone who would always greet him with her signature innocence, only asking him when he's coming back home. He always sugar-coated his replies, never keeping his empty promises.
I usually give out a reason not to talk to him. The small talk was too much.
Today was different as Lena pressed the phone to my palm, giving me an encouraging smile.
"He wants to talk to you about the suspension," she whispered, "and I'll be upstairs."
I held my breath, slowly placing the phone on my ear, watching my older sister leave me alone in the kitchen. I didn't dare to say a word first.
"Haley? Are you on the other line?" his deep voice resonating on the line.
"I'm here," I bit my lip, twiddling with the ends of my hair. I don't know about his reaction. I couldn't imagine it. "Have you heard about—"
"Save it," his voice turned colder. "It's incredibly reckless of you to do so! This suspension, will be on your permanent record. This will derail you from Ivy League universities. How could you let this happen?"
"It's a short suspension Dad, it can be easily explained—"
"Do not say anything, if you don't know anything!" he carried on with his rant. "How come you're taking this very lightly? Do you know your future is doomed? You were captain. You were achieving something. I was finally proud of you—"
"I have responsibilities as a captain," I shot back loudly, "I am responsible for my school name. I am responsible because I was in the scene that happened. I was the one who has to clean up the mess, because I was in uniform. I feel obligated to protect my members in order for them to compete in the State competition. I have accepted the consequences, and this is just a blip on my college resume."
My dad didn't dare fill the awkward silence. I ignored the fact he never was proud of me. It went longer than a minute.
"Just so you know, my punishment was the fact you didn't get a car Lena and I could share when I passed my driver's test," I wanted to continue angrily, "and stop giving Cee lies about the fact you're going to visit, because you would never step foot back here. I would never forgive you after you broke my mother's heart!"
Of course, I ended the call gracefully saying, "I know I wasn't your favourite daughter, but I'm glad this happened for me to know."
I hung up without much thought after.
AUTHORS NOTE
I would like to thank my friend, tilly, for making the cover, and for not answering my messages I pushed on her inbox three years ago. I miss her more than she could ever know, and I want her to know I'm thankful that she supported my writing since Day 1.
-kenisha-
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