Band imagines/oneshots

Give It Time (Gerard Way)

A/N: so this one is kinda long, I hope yall like it.

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Today was a big day. Actually, a huge day. Why? Because Gerard Way, the lead singer for My Chemical Romance, and also my best friend of 9 years, was getting married today. Of course everyone was so incredibly happy for him, just like they should be. But me... not so much. I have had a massive crush on Gerard for a very, VERY, long time. It was to the point were i would confess my love for him in the mirror when i was alone.. yeah, I know.. pathetic. The worst part about all of this is that his soon-to-be wife, Emily, asked me to be one of her brides maids. Of course i said yes, not wanting to be rude but also... who could just.. say no to something like that? I don't know.. maybe I'm just too nice of a person to refuse. "Y/N? How do I look? Is it too much? Oh god, what if gee doesn't like it.. what if he doesn't want to marry me because of how I look.. ugh!!" I was broke out of my trans by Emily, asking me how she looked in her dress. "Don't worry, you look gorgeous.. gerard is a really lucky dude" I say with a reassuring smile, seeming to make her feel a bit better as she smiled and once again looked in the large mirror at herself. In all honesty, I couldn't care less. I wasn't really the... fancy smancy fashionista type of girl. She really did look stunning though, better than I could have ever looked. I understand why gee wanted to be with her. She was funny, pretty, easy to get along with.. all the things I wasnt. Why would I ever think that a girl like me would stand a change against her. I walk out of the fitting room we were in.. right across the hall from gerards. I go to head down the spiraling stairs that lead to the main room of the church, until I hear a door open, and I see gerard walk out.. in his tux. Oh my god was he perfect. His long, dyed red locks almost spilling on to the tight, black fabric of the jacket of his tux. I stare at him in awe, until he breaks the silence with a loud dog whistle. "Well now Y/N, you look hawt!" He played, with a smirk on his face. I blushed in embarrassment, and gave him a playful shove in the arm.  I was wearing a almost skin tight baby blue dress, with a blue ribbon choker, and the same color heels. That's what all the brides maids wore as well. I didnt like it, but I had to were it. "You don't look to bad yourself" I reply, trying to hide the fact that I could literally shove my tongue down his throat right here and now. Was that too much? Mabye a little, but like I said.. I was madly in love, and I couldn't help it. "How is Emily doing?" Gerard broke the awkward silence with that question. "Great, she's just a little nervous.. but I mean who wouldn't be, shes getting married... to one of the greatest guys on earth, might I add" and with that he chuckled, and I started to pick my nails. I do that when I'm nervous, it was a habit. And right now, I was trying not to burst into tears of pure embarrassment in front of him. This may of been the greatest day of his and emily's life, but in all honesty.. it was my worst. Ugh.. how could I be so selfish? I should be happy for my best friend, but instead I'm wollowing in my own self pity. I am just a problem. A disappointment. Nobody loves or cares about me, that's obvious. Why am I even here? I should be dead. Oh how wonderful that actually sounded. "Y/N, hey, you alright?" Gee says, snapping me out of my toxic thoughts. It was then that I realised I was crying, I felt cold damp tears against my hot flushed face. It probably started when I started thinking about.... that stuff.I quickly wipe away my tears, and think of a lie to tell him. "Yeah! Yeah, uh, I'm fine! Totally fine.. im just so happy for you gee!" I say with fake enthusiasm, this was defininetly not the truth. But he believed it, because he now had a huge proud smile on his face, giggling like a school girl. "Y/N!! WERE ARE YOU.. WE NEED YOU IN HERE.. NOW" I hear a voice scream from Emily's fitting room. It sounded like her sister, vensessa. "I have to get back In there" I rush, acting like I was eager to get back in there.. when really, all I wanted was to talk to gee.. all day and all night. I push open the door and see emily, with her long lace vail now on, and her roses in her hand. "We added everything else.. how does the finished product look?" She said, posing and vogueing like she was on a runway. "Absolutely stunning" I say, with a huge smile. I have nothing against emily, its just.. I envy her more than anything. And of course everyone knows why. We hear bells go off, signaling that it was time. Well, here it goes. My one and only true love, giving his heart and soul and.. everything to the woman standing next to me. I felt a ache in my stomach and my chest, i felt like I was going to throw up and cry at the same time. This must be what true heartbrake felt like.

The next moments of the wedding were a blur, next thing I know we are standing at the altar, the priest speaking "you may now kiss the bride" and gerard and Emily are pretty much sucking faces. I look down, to hide the look of disappointment on my face. This was it. He was happily married now, and I was left deep in the dust. But i cant help but think, he is happy now. The happiest he has ever been, actually. And that's all I truly wanted for him. It was time for me to let things go... to move on. And that's what I did. Or, at least I tried.

*7 months later*

Gerard and Emily had just got back from their honeymoon.. and what was I doing? Oh.. just getting flat face wasted by myself. I had took those few months to try and get over gee, while also trying to fight off those vile thoughts I had in my head... more like fantasies. But it was much harder than I thought it would be, and me trying to get better soon became me becoming a depressed alcoholic wreck.

So there I was again, alone in the dark.. at the edge of my bed, a few empty beer cans and a completely empty bottle of vodka sitting by my side. I was out of it, I was numb. I felt absolutely nothing. The only joy I had ever gotten out of life anymore was when I drank my sanity away. But even then, there was a giant empty hole that I could never fill. I just stare at my feet, completely wasted and out of it, until I heard my phone buzzing next to me. I picked it up, trying to focus on the screen, and when everything came into focus.. I seen the name 'gee'. I stare at it for a second, until deciding not to answer it.. except for when I go to put it down, my thumb accidentally hits the answer button. I freak out and hold it up to my ear, trying so hard to get out normal sounding words. "Uh.. erm.. uhhh.. h-h-heyyy gee" I slurred, trying to sound as normal as possible.. but failing. "Hey Y/N!! It so great to hear your voice!! Anyway, just wanted to tell you that   Emily and i just flew in from our honeymoon" I sigh, for a split second I had managed to forget about all that. "Thats.. uhm.. that is coolio gee" I slur more words, this time hickuping at the end "Coolio..? Y/N are you drunk?" He said, sounding worried. God damnit. I knew my stupid ass wouldn't be able to hold it together long enough to fool him. I quickly shouted a no, before hanging up. I threw my phine across the room and scram. What was the point of all of this anymore? The person I was closest too now had far more important things to handle..I had lost my job a few weeks ago, and I was about it get kicked out of my apartment. I wasn't moving forward in life.. actually the opposite. Thats it. There is nothing left here for me anymore. There is no point. I make my way to the bathroom of my apartment, and I wince at the sudden  burst of light. I hazely search through my medicine cabnet, finally finding my ticket to a way out of this shit mess I call my life. I stumble into the kitchen and grab the only liquid I have in my fridge, another bottle of vodka. I dump out the whole thing of pills in my hand, and I chuck them all into my mouth, swallowing every single one, and taking a huge swig of the liquid. I stumble my way over to my couch, and I plop down, curling into a ball.

I start to feel dizzy, well... dizzier.. and my vision hazes over even more. I felt my insides slowly numbing,  the air suddenly turning cold... my breathing getting slower. This was it. This was the end. I was finally free from this horrible wreck I got myself Into. Goodbye, cruel world.