X - Y - Z

ONE - INTRO

I see Charlotte exit the on-campus apartments. Her eyes are scanning the lot, searching for me of course. I'm so thankful she's going with me to do this.

I don't want to cry about this, but I think if I were alone I'd have a full on breakdown when all I want is to get this over with, frankly. I'm just not really ready to deal with these emotions yet. It was much easier last time because I had something to focus on. Now, I have nothing.

I continue to watch as she pulls her phone out and a few seconds later mine vibrates - a text asking if I'm here yet or not. The clock's just now flicking to 10am, so it's not that I'm late. She's just been keeping close tabs on me.

Honking the horn while sending a reply has her jogging towards me. Her curls bounce around playfully on her head, the color of the month - electric blue - shining in the sun, causing a smile to tug at my lips.

My car door swings open, and she lands with a thunk in the seat. "Hiya Chuck!" I greet her with a small grin.

Her only response is a perfectly mastered side-eye. This whole situation has been hard on her as well.

"Sooo...we cryin' today or no? What's the game plan here?"

"What kinda question is that, Chuck? Obviously there will be no tears today. Today is not about tears," I say matter-of-factly. "At least not for me. If you need to let loose a few then go right ahead. I know you guys were close," I add with sincerity. She doesn't need to handle her grief the same as me, which would be to not.

"I'm good Hazy," she replies with an honest smile. "So," she exclaims with a loud clap of her hands, "singing at the top of our lungs there and back then." It's a statement, not a questions, and one I completely agree with.

"You know me so well, Chuck!" Tossing her my iPod, I pull out of the parking lot and head towards the highway.

"Old school country, 90s alternative, or Big Smile playlist?" Charlotte questions while starting to scroll through the iPod I've had since I was 16. It may not be the newest model, but that sucker has so much music on it.  I would probably feel like someone cut off my right arm if I lost it. 

"Let's go old school country for now. I have a feeling we may need the other two later on." 

"Your wish is my command!"

That twangy guitar starts thrumming through my speakers. Charlotte and I turn on our thickest southern drawls, which honestly isn't that hard, and sing along to George, Merle, Waylon, Willie, Johnny, and the Hanks. It's a lot of broken hearts mixed with rowdy drinking songs, and we love it!

It's about an hour drive, all of which we spend singing at the top of our lungs.  When we reach the little town where today's activity will be taking place, we're both practically hoarse and have tear streaks down our cheeks from laughing so hard. 

I pull into this cute little bakery/diner to have quick bite.  It has always been one of my family's favorites. Plus there are not too many options in this one-horse town, so to speak.

"Gosh I love this place!! They have the most amazing french dip!" Charlotte exclaims with a look in her eye that says she can already taste the goodness.

"Oh man, their au jus is like heaven. I gotta see what the special is though before making any commitments. Remember that time we got those 'Everything but the Kitchen Sink Nachos'?! I think I had to wear my pants unbuttoned for a week."

"Those were insane." Charlottes pauses thoughtfully for a moment before getting a decidedly serious look on her face.  "Nope. Still going french dip. I even had a dream about it last night."