Worthless

Leaving

Razy🔮

I finished writing the letter that I was going to leave for everyone

I'm leaving to go to California

To get a new start,although I am going to keep in touch with everybody

I just feel like I've messed up everyone's life of course I didn't tell anyone that except for Lucas

He didn't agree but he let me go,I'm not going to be telling Trevor about anything for now and Lucas wore he wouldn't

I placed everyone's specially made letters into there right envelopes and Sat my suitcases by the door for when I leave

I simply grabbed the envelopes and my purse and headed for the door leaving out driving to Ayo and Seyana place to put there letter in its mailbox

Trevor🖕🏾😈

You got this just go and do it for your daughter,its all for her

I said trying to convince myself that I was making the right choice by going to rehab

Yep Im going but only for my daughter,I finally realized how much I was hurting Crystal and she didn't deserve that

(Yall some crazy shit happened)

Ima apologize after I leave this place

I slowly walked into the the rehab center hearing nothing but my heart beating heavy

Before I knew it I was at the front desk

"Hi how may I assist you on this wonderful evening"

"Hello and Im here to get help"I said letting the words come out my mouth

"Might I ask your name"She said pulling out some papers

"Trevor Jackson"

"Okay sir if you would kindly have a sit in the waiting area over there I would appreciate it"She smiled kindly at me

Her being so nice irritated me

I simply nodded my head making my way to the bland amd plain designed waiting room

I soon as I sat down I got a call from Lucas

I answered

"Wassup,Im kinda busy right now"I said in a whisper tine not wanting to draw a lot of attention to me

"TREVOR YOU GOTTA COME NOW MAMA IN THE HOSPITAL"

"W-Wait what"I asked my voice cracking not caring if anyone heard me anymore

"Mamas in the hospital you gotta come right now"Lucas said  urgently sounding like he was crying

"I-Im on my way"I said hanging up

I jumped up out of my chair getting a couple stares from people and I didn't even stop to talk to the front desk lady I just took off running towards the door

As I ran out it felt like everything was in slow motion as I thought about how I treated her

(Like that but 2:16 to 2:35 )

"Baby I just need a little money"

"I have already told you Im not giving you any money"I some what yelled at my mother

She was begging me for money for some reason but I didn't really care

"Son please all Im asking for is $30 please I really need it for my me-"

"IDGAF GET THE FUCK OUT"I yelled becoming really irritated with her

She slowly nodded as I looked at her Carmel skin as tears rolled down her face as she walked out

I simply rolled my eyes pleased as she left my office shutting the door ever so sofly

I felt accomplished and so angry,like a fire was building inside of me but I couldn't put it out

•

"Hey baby"My mother chimed in a very happy tone as if Jesus came back on earth

"What do you want now ma"I said clearly showing my irratation in my voice

"I was just calling to ask if you could pi-"She started but I quickly cutt her off

"Stop right there"I started hearing her sigh"I am not a taxi or a uber so therefore Im not picking up anybody"

"You can't pick up your own sister"She snapped at me shortly after I heard her cough

My sensitive side kicked in

Is she sick........Who cares,my mind starting to kick back in shooing away my sensitive side as if it was nothing but a little ant

"Goodbye Mother"I said hanging up but not before hearing her call my name

•

I didn't notice I was crying and gripping the steering week so tight that my hands started to burn,but I didn't care all I cared about right now was making sure that my mother was ok

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Y'all I know this is always my excuse but I was going through some things and I needed time away but thats still no excuse I could've updated so I apologize from the bottom of my heart❤👑