This one takes place after The Toaster. It happens during the book I’m writing now, although it won’t appear in that directly, as that’s written from Mel's sister Brittany's point of view.
~~~~
‘Didn’t you already take one of those?’ I ask Will, as he downs another tranquilliser.
‘It’s not working,’ he says. He is looking a bit pale.
I grab the box off him and stuff it in my bag. ‘No more. We’re not even on the plane yet. Just try to forget what’s to come.’
‘I can’t.’
‘Why didn’t the doctor just give you sleeping pills?’
‘Well, we weren’t going to find out if I’m still afraid of flying if I was asleep the whole time.’
I look at him. He’s not only pale, he’s sweaty.
It’s going to be a long flight. Even if it is only 70 minutes.
***
The first real sign of trouble comes as we’re just levelling out after takeoff.
‘I’ve never noticed before,’ Will says, ‘but clouds are really pretty, aren’t they?’
I stare at him. He doesn’t look pale and sweaty anymore, which is good. Instead, he’s slumped in his seat and has a rather dazed expression on his face. Alarm bells start ringing. ‘Will, exactly how many pills did you take?’
‘Oh, you know,’ he says, waving his hand vaguely. ‘A few.’
Oh my God, he’s overdosed. We’re at twenty something thousand feet and he needs hospitalisation. Where‘s the nearest hospital? I’m not even sure what county we’re over.
Okay, don’t panic. Breathe deep. Need to find help.
I jab the button for the stewardess repeatedly. I drum my feet on the floor while I wait, looking anxiously at Will.
‘How can I help?’
‘I think my boyfriend needs a doctor.’
***
If there’s one question guaranteed to shake up plane passengers, it has to be, ‘Is there a doctor on board?’ Everyone is now staring at us.
‘There’s only three missing from the packet,’ the pharmacist – the closest thing available – says. ‘When did you say he took the first one?’
I think back. ‘About an hour ago.’
‘It’s very unlikely to have done any damage, but to be safe he’d better go to hospital when we land. Luckily, it’s only a short flight.’
I breathe a sigh of relief. I try to calm myself down. I should have just checked the packet myself. Three’s only one too many. ‘Thank you.’
‘Just keep a close eye on him. If you notice anything worrying, call for help.’
I turn back to Will as the pharmacist heads back to his seat. He’s waving a hand slowly back and forth in front of his eyes and watching it avidly. Does that count as worrying?
We’re flying from London to Cornwall to visit my sister, as part of our ongoing efforts to “rebuild our sisterly bond.” Racing straight off to the hospital is really going to help.
Will starts humming. ‘What’s that song?’
‘Which song?’
‘The goblin one.’
I wrack my brain. It ignores me.
‘See the little goblin, see his little feet…’
Oh, God.
‘… and his little nosy-wosy. Isn’t the goblin sweet?’
Oh, help, he’s gone Blackadder on me.
The singing continues and gets louder. People nearby start putting earplugs in. I slide down in my seat and promise myself I will never, ever embarrass Will in public again. Honestly, I don’t know how he puts up with this.
Though, to be honest, my chances of keeping that particular resolution are not high.
Then it stops. Oh, thank God.
‘Mel, I want to get out now.’
I start undoing my seat belt. ‘I think I’d better go with you.’
‘But you’re afraid of heights.’
‘Huh?’
‘Well, it’s a long way down.’
It takes me a minute to tune into his thought waves. ‘Oh no, you can’t get out of the plane.’
‘But the clouds are so pretty.’
‘No.’
‘Yes.’
‘No.’
‘Yes.’
My boyfriend has morphed into a toddler.
‘I’m going!’ he says, starting to fumble with his seat belt.
I jab the button to call the stewardess again. I can’t contain him by myself. And if I sit on his lap without explanation, we’re going to end up on some kind of clips show.
‘How can I help?’
I grin nervously. ‘You wouldn’t happen to have any handcuffs on board, would you?’
***
I call Brittany as soon as we land.
‘We’re going to be a bit late. I have to take Will to hospital.’
‘Hospital?’
I look across at Will, still handcuffed to the chair. ‘Don’t ask.’
