You're The Fucking Freak!

I'll Sign It.

"You think I'm the freak? You're the fucking freak!" Evan Hansen cringed at the words as they rang through his head, he sat in the computer lab, trying to come up with a pep talk for himself:

"Dear Evan Hansen,
Turns out that today wasn't a great day, it won't be an amazing week or an amazing year, because Connor Murphy.
Because I have all my hope pinned on Connor Murphy who doesn't even know me, and ended up just shoving me to the ground earlier today because I can't control my stupid nervous laughter.
Sincerely, your best and most dearest friend, Me."

Evan sighed, pressing print. He went to stand up but just started shaking. Evan shrunk down into his seat, shaking and beginning to cry as he thought of how much of a loser he was. "Hey, uh...are you okay?" Connor mumbled, "I'm-Uh-I-" Evan stammered, Connor held a piece of paper. "Isn't this your's? Dear Evan Hansen....because Connor Murphy?"
Evan shook his head even more, "No uh, can-can I-please-have it back?" Connor quickly read over it before reluctantly handing it to Evan. "I'm sorry I pushed you." Evan shrugged, "Doesn't matter, I'm just a loser anyways." He laughed awkwardly. "You really aren't Evan...how did you break your arm?"
"Oh I....I fell out of a tree."
"That is just the saddest fucking thing I have ever heard. Oh my god."
Evan looked down at the floor, "I...was just climbing and I lost my grip..."
"You let go."
"What?"
"You let go."
"How would-"
"It's pretty fucking obvious."
"Damn it...I didn't want attention or-to bother you-"
"No-you're fine."
"I guess."
"I don't know why I'm telling you this but I've tried to kill my self before too."
"Oh." Evan glanced at a scar on Connor's arm.
"Nobody's signed your cast."
"Ya."
"I'll sign it."
"Oh, you don't have to-"
"You have a sharpie?"
Evan nodded and handed the taller boy a sharpie, Connor wrote his name across the cast.
"There, now we both can pretend to have friends."
"I wish it wasn't pretend." Evan mumbled,
"I'm sorry I shouldn't have said anything-"
"Wait? Doyoumaybewannahangout-"Evan rushed out of his mouth. The Murphy coughed awkwardly, "I'm not a good person Evan-"
"You're talking to me-a bad person-would've just-ruined my life with that note, I just-"
"Evan."
"Ya?"
"Do you like, want to come over?"
"Ok."
"Ok?"
"Ok."
Connor nodded and led Evan away from the computer lab and towards the school doors, they raced off heading to the Murphy's. Zoe Murphy was on the couch, so Connor took Evan up to his room. "Sorry it's a mess," Evan shook his head, "I, uh it's-"
Evan looked down, Connor just stared at him.
"You can sit down, if you want."
"Ya-okay!" Evan nodded quickly and sat down.
"So uh. What do you normally do with your friends?" Evan looked down again, "I don't really have friends."
"You don't...?"
"I mean, why would I? I'm just-just a-a loser-Jared-he's-he-doesn't-like me he's just a family friend and- I just..."
"Wish that what you said mattered, wished that everything was different."
"Ya."
The two stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity, Evan finally broke the silence.
"I've never told anyone," Evan picked at his shoe,
"But I um, I'm gay."
"That's cool." Conor responded.
"ButIGuessYouCouldBeAHomophobicSoIDontKbowWhyIToldYou!"
"Evan."
"Y-ya?"
"Chill my man, I am too." Evan smiled softly at Connor, "Oh, hah, that makes it less awkward."
"Ya,"
"Yup."
"I have a PS4, I don't know if that would interest you."
"Oh, that sounds fun!" Evan stuttered.
Conor nodded and turned the PS4 on, the two took a seat on the floor next to each other, and immediately began the game they picked. It had been hours of them gaming, and talking when Conor decided to make a small move. He took his hand and moved it onto Evan's knee, Evan slowly slid his hand down to Conor's. "I..uh..uh-" Evan stuttered, Conor leaned down closer to the shorter boy and placed a kiss on Evan's cheek. Evan blushed and Conor backed away, "I'm sorry I shouldn't have."
"Oh no, it's fine..." Evan smiled.
"Stay the night?"
"Are you sure?"
"It's fine. My parents are on vacation with Zoe."
Evan smiled to himself and Conor pulled him over and onto the bed. "Evan."
"Hmm?"
"Do you want a change of clothes? You're in like..."
"Kakis."
"Ya those."
"Well I don't want to be a bother." Conor shook his head and went to his drawers and pulled out some clothes for Evan. "Here. You can change in here." Evan nodded and got up, and started to change in the corner of the room. Conor looked at Evan wearing a T-shirt of his and thin athletic shorts Zoe had given him. Evan walked back over to the bed, noticing Conor had stripped down to his boxers. "Sorry, I always sleep like this." Evan nodded, "No biggie." Conor nodded and let Evan slide into the bed and next to the window. Conor smiled to himself and took his arm, placing it over Evan. He placed his face onto Evan's neck, his mouth nearly centimeters away from Evan's ear, his breathing tickled Evan.
"You know, you're cute when you stutter."