Your Girlfriend Side Story: I Smile ✓

I Loved You

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Sept 2017, I loved you
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‘I resent you
I hate the times I had with you
After I lost you
Everything became meaningless
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I don’t long for you
I don’t miss you
Your love that you gave to me (you)
I don’t want to remember it
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Really I loved you
It’s because I loved you so much
Because I want to forget you but I can’t
That’s why I want to forget you
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Really, I loved you
That’s how much harder it is
I want to hate you
But I can’t so I hate you even more’
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How much I want to hate her, I just can't.
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‘Yoonie, we're going to have a concert, will you available on Sept 1st - 3rd?’ I sent her the picture of our ticket concert, hopefully she able to come.
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Yes, after I left hospital that day. I sent her messages the next day, asking about her condition and we still keep in touch until now. As a good friend? Hopefully.
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‘Wow! I'd like to! It's been awhile since I watch you perform! I'll check my schedule and tell you later!’ she replied and I grin cheekily.
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At least, I'm going to see her again.
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“Guys, this is Yoonji, my best friend and Yoonji this is Sungjin, YoungK, Jae, and our maknae Dowoon.” I introduced her to my bandmate, and they welcomed her well.
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Yoonji is now in the backstage with us for our concert. I can't believe she made it here, knowing how possessive her boyfriend is.
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“Yah, is she the 'Yoonji' that keep appearing on your music sheets?” Sungjin elbowed me and I widened my eyes, since Yoonji might hear it.
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“Later, hyung. Later.” I told him and turn back to Yoonji. “So, how do you like our songs?” I heard Jae asked her.
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She was laughing and have fun with us. How I wish she's still mine and were here to supporting me as her boyfriend. I wish.
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Well, I think I shouldn't be that greedy. I suppose to be so happy to have her here by now. At least, I can see her.
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‘I know
I know that what I’m saying right now
Is really stupid
That it doesn’t even make sense
I know, I know
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After you left me
My world had
Already stopped
It had already ended
Oh
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Really I loved you
It’s because I loved you so much
Because I want to forget you but I can’t
That’s why I want to forget you
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Really, I loved you
That’s how much harder it is
I want to hate you
But I can’t so I hate you even more’
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Few days later,
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I was eating alone in a small eating place when I catch the familiar glimpse of her walking from the entrance. Alone? I asked my self as I wait her boyfriend to walk in as well, but nope?
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I watched her using her phone for awhile before she let out a long sigh. Yoonji don't like to eat alone outside, but why is she alone right now? Where's Taehyung?
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Without thinking twice, I grab my meal and walk to her table to sit beside her. She was staring, cutely.
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“Stop staring and don't yell. Just continue eating. At least you're not eating alone right now.” I muttered slowly without turning to her and continue eating.
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“W-wonpil, why are you here?” she still didn't look away from me, I can feel it.
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“Eat. Of course.” I turn back at her and smile. “I saw you come in earlier, but I thought you were with someone. So I didn't call you.” I explained and she nod, maybe got the sign that I referred to her boyfriend.
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Both of us fall into deep silent as eating was the only thing we focus on. It's comfortable, even when both of us didn't talk to each other. I love it. I don't know how she feel, but I have feelings that she didn’t mind about it.
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“Oh?? You're here eating alone without telling me huh? Oh, who's this....? Yoonji, right?” A voice popped in and I can't believe, it's Sungjin. He smile as soon as he notice Yoonji beside me.
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“H-hyung.. I told you all I'm hungry, but it seems like you all don't want to eat, so I came here alone and accidentally met Yoonji.” I explained.
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“Really? Or you both just actually secretly dating but you don't want to tell us huh? That's why you invited her to our backstage huh?” Sungjin teased while smirking while I glare at him.
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Before Yoonji can response anything, I quickly answer him.
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“No. It's not like that, hyung. We really meet here accidentally.”
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“Aish, this guy. Both of you look so cute together. Just date already if you haven't. You know our company let us to date now.” Sungjin said and I was lowkey wishing it could come true. I wish.
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I clear my throat and excuse my self to toilet to calm down my heart. Sungjin's tease didn't help, instead it makes me want her more. I want her back but I can't because she belong to someone else now.
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Can you imagine how frustrated it was?
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Sighing, I come back to the table. Watching both of them talking comfortably. I hope Sungjin didn't reveal anything to her.
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We were talking and laughing after we done our meal when suddenly someone interupt us.
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“Oh, Yoonji? Taehyung? I don't know you both were he…re.” someone pat her shoulder and I look up to see him.
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Seems like it's Jimin and Jungkook, BTS members. They were smiling but it faded away when he realize it's me who sat beside her.
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“Sorry, I thought it was Taehyung.” Jimin smile at us and his eyes turn to her. “I thought you were with him.” He added with lower voice but I can clearly heard him as I slurped my drink.
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“I called him but he's busy. He said he can't make it.” she muttered lightly and I can't help but eavesdropping and I bet Sungjin do the same.
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“Busy? But he's just doing nothing in his room the last time I checked.” Jungkook blurted it out and I took a quick glance at them lightly.
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“Uh, we're leaving first, okay? See you.” Jimin added and dragging Jungkook out with him.
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Once they were gone, she let out a sigh and I quickly ask her.
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“Did you both fought?” I asked, based on what I saw earlier and what I heard just now.
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“No. He's just busy. That's all.” She replied before gulp down her drink.
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“Who's Taehyung? Taehyung from BTS? That was Jimin and Jungkook from BTS too right? You know them?” Sungjin were confused, but I can't answer him yet.
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“His friend clearly said he's doing nothing. Don't lie to me, Yoonji. Did he mad at you? Because you came to our concert?” I continue asking. Because I will feel bad if they fought because of me. I don't want her to feel sad.
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“Guys, can one of you answer me? Don't tell me Yoonji is dating someone else. How could you do that to our Wonpil?” Sungjin keep complaining.
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“Yoonji-ah, did he hurted you? Did he yelled at you? If he did anything bad to you, you should tell me. Okay?” I told her and I really mean it. I wish she knew that I still love her. I care about her.
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“We're good friends right? Good friends should care about each other, right?” I added, don't want her to feel uneasy toward me. If being her good friends can make her happy, then I'll gladly accept it.
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She nodded slightly and smile at me then I return it.
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“God, you both really ignoring me huh? Is it just both of you here, huh?” Sungjin were complaining once again and she was about to laugh and I also about to answer him when in a blink of eyes someone walked in and punch me on my face.
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Before I realize, l was laying on the ground. Taehyung throw his fist on me. Hard.
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“I TOLD YOU TO FCKG STAY AWAY FROM MY GIRLFRIEND! ARE YOU DEAF?!” He yelled and Sungjin helped me to get up slowly. Corner of my lips must be bleeding by now, but I couldn't careless about that.
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“T-Taehyung stop! You've misunderstood!!” She tried to block him from me while Jungkook and Jimin try to hold Taehyung back.
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Instead of getting calmer, he's getting angrier, watching her girlfriend protecting me.
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“SHUT UP! I KNOW WHAT I SAW!!” Taehyung yelled at her. What the hell!
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“Don't yell at her! You shouldn't treat her that way Kim Taehyung!” I stood up and about to push Taehyung away, but she hold my arms, prevent me to doing whatever I have in mind.
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Please, Yoonji. Don't show that face to me.
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“SHE'S MY GIRLFRIEND I CAN TREAT HER IN ANY WAY I WANT TO! MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS!!” He shout and punch me one more time but this time I move faster and punch him back harder.
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That's not for hitting me, but that's for screaming at her. She doesn't deserved that!
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“Taehyung! Wonpil! Stop!” she shouted and go between us.
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Sungjin were behind me to hold me back while Jungkook and Jimin were holding Taehyung but he keep trying to free himself, which he did.
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“Leave! With me, now!” Taehyung yelled and pulling her with him, but I quickly hold her other free wrist, don't want her to leave with Taehyung.
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“Don't leave, Yoonji-ah.” I muttered and she turned around to me, and smile.
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“I'm sorry, Wonpil. Please take care of yourself.” she said before free her wrist from my grip as I sadly watch her leave with Taehyung.
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My heart broke, once again.
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‘To be honest, no matter how much I try to erase you
I know I can’t, yeah
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To be honest, I know that to me
You’re someone who I just can’t forget
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Loved you’
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“I'm sorry for what he did. He's just emotionally unstable and when he saw-” Jimin apologize but I laugh.
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“I'm fine. Don't worry about me.” I smile, as if I'm okay “Just please help me watch over her. I just don't want him to hurt her.”
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“You shouldn't worry about that. We know how much hyung loves her. I'm sorry, we'll leave first.” Jungkook replied before leave with Jimin.
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I fall down to sat on my seat as I hung my head low. Why does it still hurt like hell? Why did I still yearning for her when I clearly know her heart isn't with me anymore?
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“So, you really falling for his girlfriend huh?” Sungjin finally asked.
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“She was mine, first.”
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‘Because I want to forget you but I can’t
That’s why I want to forget you
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Really, I loved you
That’s how much harder it is
I want to hate you
But I can’t so I hate you even more’
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I wish I could hate you, Yoonji.
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