Suicidal Love

Chapter Four

•Violet White• 

We finished asking each other question which resulted in an argument about which song is sadder, May day Parade's: Terrible things or All time Low's: Remembering Sunday. I personally vote for Terrible Things because of the way they wrote it. With so much emotion and passion; the song always gets me to cry my eyes out.

~After School~ 3:00~

I was on my way to meet Austin!! I was currently listening to Forever and Always by Parachute; this song is so fucking perfect.

♪"She finishes the vows,

But, the beeps are getting too slow his voice is almost to low

As he says,

I love you forever; Forever And Always,

Please just remember,

Even if I'm not there,

I'll always love you....

Forever and always"♪ I sang along.

I was at my destination... Did I mention I'm slightly crying right now...? No? Well I am, this song is just so sad; seriously, what the hell happened to "Happy-Ever-After" huh?

I parked, grabbed my iPhone to check the time, 3:25.  I'm early, oh well, I got out with my phone and earphones, locked my car and proceeded to the swings, because I'm still a child at heart! Even through all the bullshit...

I put my earphones in and played my music slightly swinging with the wind going through my hair, while I waited for Austin. I was listening to Iris the cover by Sleeping with sirens.

I closed my eyes and sang along.

"And I'd give up forever to touch you 'Cause I know that you feel me somehow You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment And all I can breathe is your life 'Cause sooner or later it's over I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's meant to be broken I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming Or the moment of truth in your lies When everything feels like the movies Yeah, you'd bleed just to know you're alive

And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's meant to be broken I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's meant to be broken I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am"

This song is so deep. I love that about it. My favorite lyrics from the song are probably, When everything feels like the movies, yeah you bleed just to know you're alive .

Someone's shadow was blocking my sunlight, so I looked up. "Austin?" I asked tilting my head. I couldn't see his face .

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I know this sucks so many balls guys, I'm truly sorry. It's just that my antidepressants aren't working anymore since I got a lower dosage and the thoughts have been kicking in. I am truly sorry for the very long wait. I know this chapter sucked but I hope you stick around.