Dick Figures: Dare Ya

The Collection

"auggg..." Red huffs crossing his arms in a pout.

"Red are you even listening? Do you hear what I'm saying?" Blue says in a worried tone. He'd been trying to talk to Red about the scam since they got home but Red isn't listening. "Red?"

"yes I'm listening." Red grumbles.

"no you aren't Red!" Blue grumbles. "I'm not trying to nag you Red but you keep making me repeat myself."

"you're doing a bad job not nagging then." Red grumbles.

"this isn't a lecture damn it! I just want you to understand what I'm trying to say!" Blue growls.

"it's fine it doesn't matter." Red shrugs. "I got paid, why do you care so much?"

"because you got paid because you got scammed and the scammer is an idiot!" Blue yells frustrated. "and I'm trying to tell you that you got scammed and you aren't listening!"

"what the fuck does it matter!?" Red yells back. "all I did was jizz in a cup for money!? It isn't going to fucking hurt anybody except the dumbass that paid me 100 dollars."

"that's bull shit Red and you know it!" Blue yells back. "let me put this bluntly so you can understand. WHERE DO BABIES COME FROM!?"

"what the fuck has that got to..." Red grumbles.

"ANSWER!" Blue interrupts. "where do they come from?"

"Virginia?" Red pouts.

"and how do they get there?" Blue replies.

"duh... man jizz." Red sighs. "why does any of this matter?"

"ok Red." Blue replies. "so then what if that sample of your man jizz is put in a virginia?"

"then it makes a baby..." Red shrugs. "I still don't see how it matters.... Oh..." Red stares at the wall dumbfounded.

"finally." Blue says exasperated. "do you understand now? That sample you gave no matter how small could be used to make little Reds and because you didn't sign any paper work those women can come after you for your money."

"my money?" Red frowns.

"child support." Blue sighs. "come on... didn't you think about any of this before you left? That what those donations are for."

"I don't want that!?!" Red yells with his hands on his head. "I got to get it back!?"

"it's probably too late..." Blue sighs. "because you refused to listen to me when I was telling you at the place."

"no I will get my sperm back! Right now! come on Blue!" Red grabs his jacket again and is out the door before Blue can comprehend what's happening. He hurries after Red after he realizes what is going on.

They arrive at the place but when they get there the building is locked and the signs for the donation are gone.

Red looks around and checks the address again on his phone. "weird... I swear it was... right here a bit ago."

"looks like the scammers packed up and left." Blue frowns. "this wouldn't have happened if you had just listened to me in the first place."

"I'm not going out like this." Red growls kicking the glass door. it shatters inward. "I'll find my sample and take it back and they won't be able to stop me."

"Red are you nuts! This is breaking and entering!? You want to go to jail!?" Blue hisses.

"I would rather be in jail then shell out my hard earned cash to some bimbo who got my sample without my consent." Red growls crawling through the door into the main room.