Long Story Short (Short Stories & Thoughts)

Rant #1 (Fostering of Abuse)

Note: If this isn't doesn't go terribly, I may creat a "rant" book, or just continue to post them here.

[I am aware that this is a controversial topic and possibly "triggering", so I will tag it as such.]

Something that greatly confuses me about our society here on Earth is the modern-day fostering of abuse in our young-peoples' literature. Now, first I believe it needs to be addressed that not all young-peoples' literature portrays abuse in a loving and forgiving form. So really, there are several books on the topic that end with the abuser in question being left alone to wallow in self-pity, or going to prision, or even possibly suffering death (retributive justice is a whole different rant, so I won't get into that). I believe it's fine to talk about this stuff! It's not completely taboo! It's just when people begin portraying that relationship as positive that I have a problem. But so many books promote this female tolerance of abuse.

What the hell are you talking about Kay? Basically, look at some of the most famous novels of teen literature: 

Twilight: Quiet, moody, lonely, low-esteemed girl meets a sparkling supernatural creature that loves her. Despite being a billion years old and having the ability to get any lady-friend he wants, he choses her. Funny thing: He's a vampire. He constantly talks about being afraid of hurting her, biting her, sucking 5 liters of blood out of her body; the typical relationship problems, you know. Yet still, he constantly maintains this creepy, predatory type of control over her. Bella gets saved from being attacked/raped (when she goes out with just a friend) by Edward, hurrah! Only thing is: He only saved her because he was stalking her..? (pretty sure this is reminscent of After, (prepare for the hatemail) but I won't get into that yet.) That's not creepy right? It's an act of devotion and love. Need I say more? 

Divergent: I enjoyed Divergent when I read it a few months ago. But something kept bothering me so much about it... The relationship between Trish and Four is all loving and sweet and he's just trying to protect her! Right? (Throwing knives at your partner really is the best way to go) I have a problem with the fact that in one scene, Four mentions to Trish something along the lines of: "My first instinct is to push you until you break." If a guy you like came up to you and said that, would you really be swooning? No, it's hella creepy! Even in their dystopian land where it's normal for people to fall off buildings out of their own failure, that's pretty creepy. 

These are just two examples of this type of, he-could/wants-to-kill-me-but-it's-okay-because-we're-in-love mindset. That honestly is fostering abusive relationships and telling girls outside of fiction that, if he hurts you, it's okay! He still loves you anyway, he's just hurting with his own problems. 

This is even more prominent in actual teenage-written novels (*cough cough* Wattpad and other online writing sites). Harry Styles, who appears to be a sweet guy with a honest caring towards women, is constantly portrayed in fanfiction as "dark". Ever since the fanfiction Dark or whatever came out portraying him as a brooding, aggressive, douchey, troubled, and (wait for it) DARK character whose Achilles' Heel is a sweet, innocent girl, these stories have been EVERYWHERE. Also, not just everywhere, but famously. 

Do people really not see the problems here? People always will argue, It's just a story! We'd know better in real life! That's not true. While some may know how to get out of an abusive relationship right away, if you believe you're in love with someone for months or even years and they hit you, you're not going to be able to just walk away. People aren't like that. Psychologically speaking, people always have this mindset where they think they can change a person, make them right their wrongs and be better. The only person who can change them is themselves.

(I've watched a friend of mine suffer through an abusive relationship. She was with the guy for just two months before he hit her the first time. She never saw it coming. She didn't even really want out until the third month. It happened when he was upset by something as simple as a cop pulling him over for speeding. A person cannot predict how they will react to a situation such as that.)

Stories like these are growing day after day, and with rumors of After, a book that portrays a relationship like this, being made into a film, it makes it even more accessible. Not as many people like to read anymore, they like to watch. This will expose a larger audience to this type of relationship and make it okay, when it's not. 

For writers who write this sort of literature, I don't believe all of them even necessarily know they're doing it. They think it's fun. They think it's sexy. They think it's fresh. It's not. This story could probably go back to the freaking Stone Age and it would be the same. There's a difference between "bad boys" and abusers. They're not the same thing at all.

Don't give abusive figures/characters excuses for their actions. Don't say they were struggling or they were scared or whatever the hell you think fits. You can offer any amount of explinations, but none of them can be excuses.

[This topic makes me very angry, I apologize if I rambled quite a bit. Thanks to those who read the whole thing. Feel free to leave your own thoughts if you like!]