sidemen; oneshots

Voices (KSImon) Pt. 2

Pairing: KSI & Miniminter (JJ and Simon)
Prompt: JJ was the voice Simon couldn't get out of his head. Simon's POV of the original Voices Oneshot
Warnings: Angst, triggers (I won't put warnings)
XIX
I didn't even ask for him to appear, but I guess In a way, he saved my life.

I was on the edge of suicide before I met him.

Tears dripped down my cheeks as I held the razor blade in my hand, my arm smeared with blood whilst new blood drips on the floor.

"It's just not worth it anymore!" My thoughts ring through my head, screaming at me to just end it all.
-
"I'm sorry." I whisper to myself as I stand at the edge of the bridge, tears clouding my vision as I look down.

"Don't do it." A voice speaks to me, making me sniff and wipe my eyes, looking around for who it came from.

My eyes meet no one, except for when I look back in front of me and see a man standing there, he was almost see through.

"You have so much to live for Simon, so many people who love you." The man's voice rings through my head and cancels out all my thoughts.

"No one loves me." I whimper out and start crying again, dropping to my knees and gripping onto my arms.

My body started shaking with the intensity of my cries, rain starting to pour down on me.

"Simon listen to me," The man says, and I can almost feel his hand rubbing my back soothingly. "Someone out in the world needs you more than anything, you just haven't met him yet."

"Him?" I say aloud, my head pounding from all the crying.

"Yes." He says, and before I can ask anymore questions he disappears completely, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

My eyes catch a glimpse of the rushing water below me and I gulp, shuffling backwards and away from the ledge.

Quickly I stand up and look around me, hanging my head and starting to walk back home.

All that was on my mind was him.

From that day on I have just barely been hanging on, but just barely.

Any little thing in school would set me off, making me burst into tears and not stop until the man calmed me.

I came to know him as JJ, I always thought he was a person my mind made up, but he seems like his entirely own entity.

"How was school?" He asks when I get home, tears stinging at the corners of my eyes.

"You were there, you saw how it was." My voice quivers as I throw my bag down, the paining in my heart still very apparent.

My hands shake as my eyes flicker over to the bathroom, an overwhelming urge to relapse filling my mind.

"Don't do it." He says, moving to stand in front of me, his arms crossed.

I look at him with a lifeless stare, my eyes empty and emotionless.

"Please." He pleads and I sigh, looking away from him and walking to my room.

"So when am I meeting this 'him' you always talk about? When am I actually going to realise there's a purpose to life besides feeling fucking empty all the time!" My voice raises at the last bit, tears threatening to fall at the thought of never getting out of this hell.