Why Should I Let You Back In?

Chapter 7: Why? Why? Why?

Chad's POV

Fuck! What have i done!? I lost the most precious thing that i love. I seriously hate myself for breaking her like that. Kathy is broken... because of me. I broke my promise. When she gets home how is she gonna explain what happened? I fucking messed up. I've got to fix this. But how?

I was pacing in the bathroom, when i turned to the wall and saw blood. What was she doing in here? The wall looked cracked and i the blood was dried a bit. I was worried. Was she punching the wall or hitting her head against it? This isn't helping.

I can't stop thinking about her body when she came out of the water. She looked so beautiful, so calm and pure. Those cuts were terrible. I'm scared she might loose too much blood and end up sick. I really love Kathy, and i wish,there was a way i could show it. And anyway I'm not really inlove with Adria, I'm just using her to get over the jealousy i feel about Kathy and Jeremy. Yeah i admit it... I'm jealous.

But something about it got me feeling bad... A LOT.

But Kathy.... i know,that i love her but.. fuck!! What am i going to with this kind of sick situation?! What am i going to do with two girls?? I really regret hooking up with Adria! Okay, I'll do the right thing.

I'm gonna ignore my feelings for Kathy. Pretend there's nothing between us which there really isn't.

Bullshit.

I know it and she also does.

Man, what the hell am i going to do with this?

I ran a hand down my face, stressed out. I dont know what to do with my feelings and life. I have never been this confused and frustrated. I hate myself.

Kathy's body kept on flashing in my head. I couldn't stop thinking about it. She's very beautiful, but i dont think she knows that. She hasn't found herself. She almost looks scared. Her hazel,green eyes are perfect for her. They suit her perfectly. She's so adorable and loveable. My goal was to make her realize that, but instead i failed her. I'm such a douche.

Kathy's Pov

What a complete asshole? I hate him! How could he do that to me?
Does she know about this?! I tried so,hard to remain calm, but my boiling blood was most definelty hyping me and in a bad way. I'm so alone, so so alone.

There was a knock on my bedroom door, i didn't feel like opening for who ever it was.

Is it him? Did,he come to apologize?

Maybe he wants to fix things. Maybe he will... I dont know.

I got up and headed for the door, i opened it and saw.. Emily.

Oh.

She looked worried and concerned. She noticed my puffy eyes and bloated face. She pounced on me with a big hug, i hugged her back. We hugged the life out of each other. In a second the tears came and they were burning like anger. They came with force and fire, i started sobbing. My screams finally came out echoeing the quiet house.

They were scratching the walls with anger. They were breaking the windows with force. I was honestly broken.

Why do i let myself get hurt?

Why do i give in so easily?

Why? Why? Why?

Eventually i stopped and i lied in my best friend's arms. She started playing with my hair and hummed a song. I felt calm again. I still felt broken. She kissed my forehead and smiled at me. I never knew a bad ass looking girl could be so caring. Emily is like the mother i never had, she's very kind and loving. I smiled at her but it was weak.