Lonely and Tired

Teenage Fanclub

Cathy accosted me the moment I walked through the front door. I managed to put her off with my loudly declared intention of taking a shower.

She grabbed my arm as I shot in the direction of the stairs.

"Do you need to wash the sex off?" she hissed glancing over her shoulder toward the family room where I could hear Jeff and Harper playing.

"Fuck Cathy...no!" I exclaimed in startled horror as I shook myself free and took the stairs two at a time.

Sex was not what I was washing away but as I rinsed off the scuzz of sleeping in my clothes after a night of drinking I wondered, what if it was? How would it feel after a hard night between the sheets with Brian? Very, very good I imagined. By the looks of him it would be some scorching conflagration of lust. Not that I'd ever find out. He seemed to have pretty firmly slotted me into the friend zone.

Which was for the best I decided with a sigh. Based on the events of the night before it was pretty obvious Brian needed a friend more than he needed a hook up. If I was being honest with myself so did I. I washed my hair angrily. One day I was going to move beyond the wreckage that was my marriage breakup.

I slunk downstairs clad in leggings, a long sleeved striped t-shirt and my grey t-shirt dress over the top. Comfy, low maintenance attire. Or as I liked to think of it, the layers of despair. Thick socks covered my feet and I was tempted to pull on my fleece and hide within the depths of the hood. There was no way I was going to be able to avoid Cathy's grilling and I was scared she'd ask questions I didn't really want to answer.

I fell back on to the sofa with a groan as she ushered Jeff and Harper out the door with firm instructions for Jeff to take Harper to the park for at least an hour, preferably two and to maybe stop for ice-cream on the way home.

She made a diversion via the kitchen before flopping down on the sofa next to me a bowl of popcorn in her lap as she said, "I never thought they'd leave!"

I snorted with scandalised laughter, "They are your husband and child Cathy!"

"Yeah, yeah," she waved an airy hand, "Doesn't mean that they need to be here interrupting us every five minutes while you tell me everything about last night. So come on, spill your guts."

She sat there crossed legged, eying me avidly as scooped up popcorn into her mouth. I felt like a Bachelor contestant about to do her piece to camera about the status of her one on one date to a breathlessly eager audience.

I wanted to tell her to mind her own fucking business but instead I did exactly what she asked of me. I spilled my guts.

Cathy's eyes grew wider and wider with every word I said and by the time I filled her in on my early morning status as Brian's human sized body pillow she was practically levitating.

"Oh my god. Oh. My. God! I think he likes you. Do you think he likes you? I really think he likes you!"

The disappointed look on her face when I filled her in on my almost certain friend zoning was so comical I almost wanted to laugh. I would have if the stabbing disappointment of a thwarted crush hadn't had me wondering just how inappropriate it was to ask Cathy if she knew where to procure a cask of Fruity Lexia at, I glanced at my watch, midday.

"Uh," Cathy grumbled shoving another handful of popcorn in her mouth, "boys suck."

That did make me laugh and damn if it didn't send stabs of pain up behind my eyeballs. Fucking hangover.

"I'm so disappointed." You and me both kid. "I was expecting a fucking happy ending here. That's the problem with living this close to Disneyland, it's like the 'someday my prince will come' mentality soaks into the water." She grabbed the television remote. "Screw it, let's wallow in misery."