To Destroy Yourself

The beginning of the end

It has been a week, an entire seven days since I had told my family about Ellyot. I had not moved a centimeter since I managed to sprawl myself out in the corner. I was laying on my stomach, hands still bound in the same tape as before. Delilah has tried to come in, she will stand at my door everyday and ask me repeatedly to open it. But I can't, because it would only get her hurt and because I physically couldn't with my hands taped together. My parents haven't made an effort to see me though, I'm not sure if it is because of what Ellyot had said or because Ellyot was there at all. I heard footsteps approaching my bedroom door, I knew it was Delilah, and as she drew closer I considered actually letting her in. My hands were bound, I couldn't hurt her with them... I will bind my feet too as an extra precaution, then I'll let her in.

I heard the knock after I had finally managed to get up and get the tape from my desk. I taped my ankles and knees together as quickly but tightly as I could before I told her she could come in.

"Oh,Li," Delilah gasped as she saw me back in the corner. Translucent tears began building up in her deep green eyes, the ones exactly the same to mine. There was a sudden weight covering my entire body as she flung herself on me in a almost excruciatingly tight embrace. I nuzzled my head into the crook of her neck, enjoying the physical contact while it lasted.

"W-w-where are mum and dad..." I gulped, unsure of whether I would like the answer I got but continuing to ask the question "W-w-w-why h-haven't they tr-tried to talk to m-me or a-anything?" I heard Delilah sigh and I felt her reluctantly sit up before mumbling

"They're not sure how to react to you .....having another personality and to her being dangerous.... They have been trying to find you a phycologist and other forms of help. I tried to talk them out of it but they're thinking of putting you into a children's mental ward...." I felt her apologetic gaze seeping into the back of my head. I used all my effort to turn myself over in order to face the only person that seems to give a flying fudge pop about me and how I feel,

" Please, please don't try to talk them out of it... I-I think th-that maybe b-being away, s-somewhere that people would k-know h-how dangerous and hard dealing with Ellyot would be.. M-maybe sh-she will go away..." When I had finally managed to whisper all that, my twin had begun sobbing hysterically. I wrapped my arms around her, holding her securely. Realization suddenly struck like lighting and I flung myself away from her, staring at my hands that were now out of the tape. "T-t-the t-tape... W-where I-is it? H-how d-did she -she get it o-off??" I panicked sliding away from Delilah carefully. She looked at me in confusion, sorrow and hurt. "I-I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Ellyot I-she she took the tape off my wrists... I don't know how, I didn't e-even notice her taking control o-of my arms.." "Y-you n-need to get-get out... It's not s-safe....Sh-she wants t-to hurt people, you,mum,and dad especially because of me.... Please before it's too late... I don't want you getting hurt" Delilah was staring at me with wide eyes, processing (or at least trying to) all the information and danger. But it was to late. I felt my body jerk forward so that I was on top of her. I watched helplessly as my fingers enclose around her throat in a vice grip, feeling like a puppet on strings as I saw the betrayed expression she wore on her quickly reddening face. I desperately tried to get myself off of her but my efforts were fruitless as my grip only became tighter. I had the urge to call my parents and opened my mouth to before considering that it could be dangerous for them, I paused but while I was thinking I looked down at my sister as she fought to pry my hands away from her.

"MOM! DAD! PLEASE COME HELP DEE! ELLYOT'S HURTING HER!" I heard thundering footsteps nearing my room immediately, but I turned my attention back to trying to pry myself away from my sister. Vicious laughter rumbled through my mind and managed to escape through my lips as I saw the girls eyes drifting closed,there were tears trailing down her face and the visual gave me the strength to force Ellyot to release her.Relief and anger rushed through my entire body as I was thrown harshly across the room and away from my family. " YOU PUTRID WASTES OF MATTER AND AIR! HOW DARE YOU TOUCH ME!" The monster screamed in a raging disbelief. She grabbed something that was behind us that I couldn't see but as she moved my hand into my sight revealing a pair of very sharp scissors that were aimed towards my father. Before I could give him a warning of any form the scissors had been plunged into the side of his ribs. Blood spewed around the room, all over my already dirty clothes, across Delilah who was still catching her breath. While I was screaming and crying hysterically, Ellyot was laughing. I stared helplessly down at my father who was curled on my ground screeching in agony, the scissors plunged into him to the handles. Not able to stand the sight or the fact that I had just viciously attacked over half of my family, I ran hurriedly out of the room. I sprinted into the kitchen and grabbed the sharpest knife I could see before I then continued into the bathroom and locked the door tightly shut before leaning every ounce of weight I owned on it.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I-I am so sorry, Dee. I'm sorry mom. I'm so sorry dad... I I didn't want to hurt you, I don't want to hurt you or anyone else. I'm sorry" I mumbled while tears flooded down my face. I looked at the knife that was clutched tightly in my grasp, knowing what had to be done and finally having the courage to actually follow through. I was no hero to the world, I was as much a monster as my other personality was because in a sense, I created her. Not purposely, and not willingly, but I had brought her to the world, and she had hurt the only person who had ever truly cared for me. She had made me hurt my sister, my twin, my other half.

"But Elliot, aren't I your other half?" The monster questioned, feigning hurt. "I mean I do live in your brain. If Delilah were to die, then you would live on. But if I were to die, you would die too. It goes in reverse as well. If you were to die she will still be alive, she would be sad but eventually she would forget you like everyone else already has. But if you die, there is no way for my survival. We share a heart and brain, if your heart stops then technically ,mine does as well," the taunting was evident in her voice. She was trying to lower my self esteem even though it was none existent, she was testing whether I would actually use the knife as I planned to. I laughed coldly in response, scaring myself at how similar the sound was to the horrid cackle that Ellyot uses it was.

"I'm sorry Delilah, I love you." I screamed, hoping that she heard me because those words would be the last she will ever hear from me. "Fuck you, Ellyot. See you in hell" I said as I closed my eyes and brought the steak knife harshly down upon my right wrist and sliding it across then continuing the process on my other arm. As the world slowly faded and unraveled around me I heard Delilah crying in the hallway, just as everything ended I heard her whisper through the door

"I love you Eliot. I-I forgive you"