Boyfriend Imagines

No Love

I'm sitting on the couch in my living room wrapped up in a blanket. My legs are crossed and I'm hugging my leg with my chin on my knee. The only source of light I have is from the television in front of me. I'm supposed to be watching TV to get my mind off of things, but I keep looking at my phone, wishing and hoping that he would just call me or at least send a text. We've known each other for over 6 months, and it feels like I don't know even him at all.

DING! I quickly reach for my phone on the coffee table and look at the screen to see a text from him. "Are you still up?"

After a minute or so debating on what I should reply back, I said, "I'm still up, just watching some TV before bed :)" I held the phone in my hand for a while longer, waiting for his reply.

So far it's been 10 minutes and I wasn't getting a reply back. Gosh, he's giving me so much space to be asking myself unnecessary questions...

Why did he ever tell me that he liked me if he's acting like this? Does he even like me? Why doesn't he even bother sitting next to me in class then? He doesn't even walk me out to my car like he does with that one chick who's always with him in class... He said he had a lot of female friends too... Wasn't he ever attracted to them? Why like someone like me? I'm nothing special...I don't even think I'm that attractive...  Ughhhhh!

I kicked my feet around in the air, I was just frustrated with everything! He's stressing me out and I shouldn't be stressed out over this! You know what, I'll just confront him about it the next time we talk to each other. I'll just ask a few questions.

I ended up falling asleep on the couch with my phone still in my hands.

~~~

RING RING!

Waking up to my phone ringing, I blink multiple times to get rid of the blurriness so I could see who was calling. It's him! At 11PM?! Should I pretend and say that I was sleeping? Or should I pick up?

I ended picking up the phone.

~~~

I'm so confused...I wasn't able to ask him anything that I planned to ask. It was the same thing happening every time with everything we did together. We'd talk, have fun, and everything seemed good at the moment. But then the next time we'd see each other, we wouldn't even talk. Then I'm left hanging until the next week when something happens again. I will always see him talking to another female classmate and I will always get jealous. I'd walk out of class, and he wouldn't leave her to talk to me. Everything, week after week, was the same. I hated how I was already in so deep, but luckily I wasn't deep enough to the point where I wanted to cry and rip out my heart. But I still did crumble up on the inside a little bit every time... What the hell is this?

~~~

A few days later as we were talking on the phone, he suddenly said, "You know how I asked you to go watch the performance with me?"

"Yeah, what about it?"

"I actually have to give the ticket to a classmate. It was actually hers in the first place and she didn't want to go. But now she's going sooo...I have to give it back to her."

I knew it. It's no surprise. "It's okay, I guess I'll give you the ticket back when I see you around."

"Thank you and I'm sorry, but I'll make it up to you!"

All I did was smile and say that it was okay even though I felt like complete crap...

~~~

It's Christmas and he hasn't contacted me at all for the past 3 weeks. Nothing. I guess I was right to not have high hopes. Psh, he was the one who confessed his feelings for me first, but that was a bit weird anyway since we didn't know each other much back then. Probably just using me to get some fun or something... Well, you know what? F*ck you for playing with my feelings and making me fall so hard for you...