Critical

Autophobia

"You're perfect to me, why can't you see that? " he said with pain in his eyes. I was speechless, defeated, and confused. All I could do in that moment was blankly stare back at him, tears in my eyes, not from hurt, but from myself. How could this perfect, angel-like individual possibly think a broken, scar filled, saddened girl like me is perfect; when I am far from that. He tells me over and over again that I am what he wants, what he cares about and loves, and I believe him. He doesn't truly know the happiness and joy he brings me each day, how he makes all of my worries go away, he brings back the real me. 

Suddenly, my absence of thought caused him to leave the room. No, please don't go. I sat there in silence, waiting for him to come back. Great, see what you did, you're running him away, you're pathetic, you can't do anything right. My mind was racing. Fear overtook my mind as it always does. You see, I have one safe place, only one. Not my mind, but, him.  He is my safe place, the one who is always there. He is the one thing that keeps me together when all I really want to do is fall apart.

I could hear him walking down the hallway from his room to mine, so I thought. He proceeded to the living room. See, you really did run him away, he doesn't even want to see you. I grabbed my phone and earbuds. Maybe some music will help me clear my head. I unlocked my phone to see that I had a missed call, text, and an unopened snapchat. All from Garrett. I was confused, I thought he was mad at me. Turns out I was wrong. "Come here.", I said reading his text. "Hannah!", exclaimed thinking I wasn't coming. I walked in the living room to find him in he rocking chair. 

He motioned for me to come sit with him. I smiled and crawled my way into his lap, gripping and burying my face into his neck. He kissed my forehead, "I love you babygirl.", he said softly. I looked up at him, "I love you more." I said. You see, words cannot describe the love I feel for this individual. It's like we were put on this earth to find each other.

Although I'm entirely difficult to put up with, he's managed to do it for two years so far. He puts up with my moods and accepts me for me. He helps me with my anxiety and my issues. He took me in, living with him is the best. He loves me unconditionally, as do I for him.

Author's Note..

I'm sorry I haven't uploaded on this story, nor any of the others. I have been very occupied. I didn't know what to write, so I wrote of a recent event where Garrett said something (the first line) that really meant a lot to me. Garrett, if you're reading this, I love you so much. Thank you for being mine. 

I am going to be uploaded more now, so be looking out for new updates!