The Art Guy (18+) COMPLETE, FREE to READ

Nouvelle Cusine Will Never Fill You Up

Glasgow, March 1993

The first person Kippy saw as soon as he walked into the room was John.

It wasn't unexpected, but what the way his body reacted told him he could never have prepared in advance. Basically, he saw John, and he leapt out of his skin.

Lillian had warned him John might be here, but then why should she think that was a big deal? As far as Lillian was concerned, John was a family friend (her mother's godson), Kippy knew him slightly, they were both gay, and that was it.

He cursed himself. He should have asked her to confirm the invite. "Aye, right, who exactly is coming to this shindig on behalf of yer 'Ageing Ps', then?"

The Ageing Ps shindig in question was taking place in Glasgow. Alicia and George, London creatures through and through, had felt they should stir themselves into a social activity outside the UK capital. They'd alighted on the idea of a gathering in Glasgow, George reasoning with his wife that it would give them the opportunity to see their daughter, and network with people who might be useful.

He was a hedge fund manager, whatever that was. Lillian had explained it to Kippy once, but her description hadn't enlightened him. It was to do with looking after other people's money, and roughly making rich people even richer, he thought.

Lillian had explained her dad's motivation for the party, her voice half disdainful, half gleeful about the possibilities it presented to her. One, a slap-up meal in one of Glasgow's top hotels, and two, the chance to bring together all to bring together all her friends and lord it over them. How could she possibly resist?

The lord it over bit Kippy had made up for her, but he reckoned it was 90 percent right. She'd dropped into the conversation—oh, bring anyone you like!—deliberately careless, but he wasn't fooled for an instant.

She didn't mean him to bring Jordan though, and he was relieved anyway. Jordan would hate that kind of thing. He'd also see it as proof Kippy thought he was a 'boyfriend' and Jordan always made it clear that theirs was not that kind of relationship.

Perhaps Lillian hoped he would bring along someone else, someone he'd kept secret from her so far. She harped on a lot about love and its importance, and how he should find someone 'nice'.

"Nice is you, Lillian," he'd replied when she said it once more. "My ma is always telling me that, asking when I'm gonnae bring you down to Kirkcudbright so you can meet my dad and gran."

That shut her up. While it seemed a dazzling possibility to someone as nosey as Lillian, perhaps even she baulked at the idea of a whole weekend in Nowheresville pretending to be a gay guy's girlfriend for the sake of his parents.

The Marchmonts had chosen a boutique hotel in the West End for their party. The official excuse was that the night celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary, and the invites they sent out (silver-lined, stiff cardboard) stipulated black tie.

Lillian told him he didn't need to bother—her parents were open-minded enough not to frown if Lillian's art student pals turned up in their jeans and paint-streaked tee shirts—but it made Kippy panic.

Funnily enough, it was Gaynor who came up with the solution. Gaynor was invited too, and she planned to go full Cinderella, ballgown, glass slippers and all. You had to hope Alicia and George were as open-minded as Lillian promised.

"I'm friends with all the right people, darling boy!" Gaynor exclaimed that night in the student union at he outlined his worries, waving her glass around so extravagantly Kippy feared all the Martini would spill out.