The Phoenices Volume 1 - Expired

Chapter 25 - Marissa

"What the hell, Joey!" I screamed into my phone, upsetting the sobbing boy even further. Joey, my now ex-boyfriend, had just watched the news, and upon learning that I was going to die in less than a week, decided he wanted to break up with me, his supportive and loyal girlfriend of four and a half years, today. In my rightful anger, I began to scream at him, the coding for our little hacking plan tossed aside along with my actual computer, my regards for his feelings going with them, "I was there for you, through thick and thin for longer than four years, and now, when I am at my worst you can't support me and help me out a little bit?" I screech, tears building up in my eyes from anger and disappointment at the older boy. I heard him gasping for breath between silent sobs on the other end, stuttering in an attempt to get his words out.

"I-I'm s-s-sorry I just, I d-don't t-think I'd be able to h-h-h-handle it, it's too overwhelming," he sobbed to me quietly through the speakers. My anger boiled over, my face bright red.

"I'm the one who's going to die and YOU? YOU CAN'T HANDLE IT." My voice crescendoed as the sentence passed. By the end of the line, I was once again screaming into the phone. I took a breath to begin my onslaught of words on the deserving boy when I heard a soft tapping at my door, my mom's head peeking in, tears in her eyes. She came and sat down next to me, gently pulling my phone out of my grip, quietly apologizing to Joey for me and taking me into her arms. I let the built up tears fall from my eyes, my anger dissipating only to be replaced by a great, pulsating sadness, like a storm surge of heartbreak. My mom gently ran her hand up and down my back, helping to quiet my ugly, hiccuping sobs, my face screwed into the hideous image of true pain.

"Shhhhh shh sh," she whispered soothingly, giving me a gentle squeeze before taking one of her arms from around me, reaching behind her to grab my laptop, plugging the cords back in and waking the sleeping screen before sliding it in front of me, gently tapping the keyboard, "Do something to take your mind off of it, sweet heart. Just come get me if you need me." She stood, stooping down to brush the tears off of my cheeks and kiss my forehead one more time before leaving the room. I watched the door close behind her, stretching across my floor to grab my phone before sitting back upright, taking one last shaky breath and beginning to type again. I felt my eyelids begin to droop closed, forcing myself to keep them open for longer, this needed to be finished by tomorrow. It was becoming more and more difficult to resist the strengthening urges of sleep on my already maxed out brain, and eventually, I fell asleep, face flat on the keyboard.

I jolted awake with my 2:45 am alarm, snapping up and staring at my laptop, hundreds of pages of the letter 'L' having appeared over night, drool spread over the keys threatening to seep into the crevices and destroy my computer. I quickly rushed to get a towel, changing the page before harshly rubbing the cotton cloth over the keys to dry them, before going back to my code and undoing the last long letter, or the hundreds of thousands of 'L's I had just made. I shut my laptop, sliding it into it's case and the case into my bag before grabbing my winter jacket and a pair of gloves, heading out the front door to go meet the other at the school. My bag quickly began to weigh me down, I began dragging my feet about 20 minutes in, or halfway. I began to pray that my group got the gym, I don't think I could've walked around the school for much longer after the long walk there, the thousands of sheets of paper still in my backpack from the day before. I could see the corner of the school peeking out from behind the trees, and I began to jog, very slowly, yes, but faster than the walk I was moving at before. My legs were burning with pain, but I continued on, gasping for breath when I finally reached the meeting place, a mere minutes before the first new member. I was still slightly out of breath, sitting on the bench near the doors with my bag besides me, looking at my fingernails nonchalantly to try and disguise the fact that I could hardly control the speed of my breaths in and out of my chest. I smiled at the freshman, nodding my head at him, short and sharply. I broke our eye contact, glancing back over to the deserted parking lot, hoping to see one of my friends come around the corner to avoid talking to this pipsqueak. As much time as I had spent with lowerclassmen these last few days, you'd think I would be used to them and tolerate them, but sometimes I find as much as sending a friendly smile their direction difficult, because they are so so sooo annoying sometimes. I reached into my backpack and pulled out my laptop hoping to give the kid a reason not to talk to me, but instead, when he saw my laptop his eyes lit up and his mouth dropped open in excitement before he jumped up, scurrying over to come sit next to me.