Of Diamonds and Dreams

Chapter 31

"It's like when a mother sends her child off to war. They don't know if they're ever gonna come back, you know? How can we look at such things happening and not want to do something? How can we turn our heads and pretend as if we don't see it? I can't see people in pain and pretend as if it's not there." ----Michael Jackson

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"Mrs. Jackson, please stop struggling. You need to keep the oxygen mask on and try to breathe as normally as possible." The paramedic looked over to his co-responder, "I think she's going into shock."

They had me strapped to a gurney and were quickly loading me into the waiting ambulance. Their voices seemed far away, and I was dizzy and nauseous as I began to shake uncontrollably. The dull, aching pains in my abdomen were getting stronger, but all I could seem to think about was getting to Michael. I fought against the hand holding my mask in place. "Ma'am, if you don't stop fighting, we'll have to restrain your arms, and we don't want to have to do that. Your husband is being treated and is already headed to the hospital in another ambulance. Just try to relax and we'll get you there as quickly as possible."

I couldn't stop shaking, my body quivering and quaking from head to toe. I continued to thrash about, not fully comprehending what they were saying until they finally further restrained me by strapping my arms to the gurney. My thoughts became more and more disjointed, but even through the unfocused haze my mind, I repeated the same litany over and over. "Michael...Michael...."

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The paramedics wheeled Michael's gurney through the hospital doors amid a sea of people already gathered outside. Jimmy and Kevin were following closely, trying to keep the media and onlookers at bay. How had they figured out so quickly which hospital they were taking Michael to? But then again, how did they ever manage to dog his every move? Amazing. Jimmy shook his head in consternation. He didn't have too much time to muse over the random thought as the doctors and nurses converged on Michael and rushed him away for emergency surgery. He had lost a lot of blood and they would, no doubt, have to give him a transfusion.

A couple of minutes later, pandemonium erupted outside again as two more ambulances pulled up with Cassandra in one and the reporter in the other. Matt was conscious and fairly calm, but Cassandra was a whole different story. She looked like a mummy, having been wrapped in blankets, her head thrashing weakly from side to side as the paramedics fought to keep her from dislodging the mask. She was moaning and even under the layers of blankets surrounding her, Jimmy saw the tremors taking over her tiny body.

Kevin looked over at Jimmy with wide-eyed concern and then they both stared helplessly at the doors that swung to a close after the gurney had been pushed through. They had already made the unpleasant, but necessary calls to Frank, Kathryn, and Cassandra's mother and were now awaiting flight information for them. They would have to pick the family members up when they arrived at the airport and get them to the hospital. Not an easy feat when faced with the masses of concerned fans and hungry media that would be camping out in the parking lot for days to come. But for now, all they could do is wait.....and pray.

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I didn't know if I had been sedated or finally just passed out. The first clear thoughts I had were of a nurse bustling around the room and the steady beeps of the monitors that seemed to be connected to every part of my body. I moaned behind the mask that covered my mouth and nose and the sound, though muffled, got the attention of the young woman.

She hurried to my side with a kind smile and lay a comforting hand on my shoulder and spoke quietly. "Mrs. Jackson, I'm glad to see that you're awake. Try to stay still because we're monitoring the baby right now. She seems to be doing fine for the time being so try to remain as calm as possible. Do you understand what I'm saying?"