Blessing & Curse [Peter Parker x Reader]

Troubled mind

"What if they ask you to join the avengers?" Seb asked as he handed you a burrito.

"They won't" you chuckled "I'm not that kinda mutant"

"Are you sure?" He raised his eyebrows "because you already live there"

"Even if they did..." you sighed "i wouldn't do it"

"You sure about that?" He giggled "because last time we talked about something like this you said you would never have any contact with Tony Stark"

"Well this is different" you stood up and walked to the other side of warehouse that you were in.

"How exactly? You would be very helpful" He smiled "you're an assassin that has powers! How much could they want?!"

"Hey I'm not an assassin... anymore!" You groaned "why would they want me anyway?!"

"Well... Cap is missing along with the hulk and Thor" he shrugged "they're in need of a new member"

"Peter is a better sport than me" you sat beside him "he wants this more than i do"

"He does but you are the one" he smiled "You don't let your feelings get in the way of work"

"That's harsh" you looked down "Even if they reached out i wouldn't agree, I'm basically a criminal and the only thing i want right now is to be normal"

"Then why do we train five times a week?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Stop! There is a logical reason for everything" you rolled your eyes "it's not gonna happen"

"Keep repeating that... maybe one day you'll believe it" he chuckled and stood up.

●●●

"Peter!" You said as you sprinted to the elevator "where's Peter?"

"Uh... he's at school? Shouldn't you be in school?" Tony asked.

"I... nope" you shrugged "i was supposed to work on a project today but i really need to talk to Peter"

"He's at school, kid" Tony sighed "there's nothing i can do"

"Fine, I'll text him" you groaned and walked back to your room.

You layed down on your bed and closed your eyes. As soon as you fell asleep everything changed.
"This is not gonna hurt, i promise" a doctor said as they stuck a needle on your neck. Everything was blurry and  you tried to fight back but it was impossible.
"You thought you got rid of me?" The man of your nightmares said.
"No this is a dream, you're not real!" You yelled and tried to get up.
"Look behind your ear, honey" he smirked as he placed the electroshock machine on your head "Don't be so naive, I'm everywhere..." he laughed as he turned on the machine and you screamed in pain.

"Stop!" You jumped.

"Is everything okay Miss Y/N?" FRIDAY  asked

"Y-yes" you cleared your throat and sat up. You took a deep a breath and looked for your pocket knife.

You looked at the mirror and put your hair up in a bun, then you placed the knife behind your ear and started cutting, it hurt but you had to do it. An alarm went off, your hands were covered in blood as Tony walked in the room.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" he gasped as he saw you and you freezed.

"I was just-" you sighed.

"What? What is this supposed to be?!" He took the knife away from you.

"You don't understand i was... you know..." you stuttered.

"No, i don't know!" He said.

Tony took you to get stiches as he processed what happened.
"I-i don't understand, where you trying to pierce your ears and missed or you just wanted to get my attention?".

"It's not that" you mumbled.

"Then what is it?!" He looked up at you.

"I was just trying to do something, i didn't knew an alarm was gonna go off!" You snapped.

"What were you trying to do, YN?!" He raised his voice.

"I... have something behind my ear" you mumbled.

"Why didn't you tell me that before stabbing yourself?!" He grabbed his face.

"Because you would think i was lying!" You grunted and got up.

"I would never think that! We can scan you and see!" He said "just don't do that okay?! We can help you!"

"You can't! You have no fucking idea! I'm not gonna get scanned!" You fixed your clothes "and we're not gonna talk about this!"

You stormed out of the room and walked back to your own until you heard a familiar voice and almost ran inside your room.
"Shit!" You muttered and took your phone out to call your friend but your phone crashed "what the fuck?..."

"Mr. Stark blocked your phone temporarily" FRIDAY speaked up.

"Fuck!" You yelled and smashed your phone on the floor.

"Y/N! Hey Tony told me something about you being unable to make a smart decision?" Peter walked in your room.

"What? Who the fuck does he think he is..." you walked to the door but Peter stopped you.

"Take it easy" he looked concerned.

"I'm Fine Peter! Just leave me alone" you pulled away from him and looked for your backpack.

"What's going on with you lately?! Ever since you came back from Florida you've been acting  completely different" he sounded pretty mad.

"That's because no one ever takes me seriously! I'm just another unstable mutant right? This is bullshit!" You yelled and looked for you bracelets and some clothes "I'm tired of hearing that everything's gonna be okay because it's not! I'm not okay and I'm not normal and everyone just acts like i am to make me feel better but it never fucking works! They're all full of shit and lies! They're all fucking fake..."

"Am i... am i fake? Am i full of shit?" Peter quietly asked.

"Come on Peter... You're really gonna tell me that everything you said was real?" You looked up at him "that we were in love?"

"What do you expect me to tell you? What are you talking about?" Peter looked down at you.

"You're really gonna act like this is real? like you didn't do this just to impress Tony, to be a new member of the Avengers? Oh you would love that! They're in need of a new member" you chuckled.

"What are you talking about? So you're just saying that this is not real? So you don't love me do you?" Peter's eyes filled with tears.

"Peter, everything I've done it was for you, i almost died for you" you said.

"You haven't answered my question" he swallowed hard.

"Do you?" You asked back "i mean... we barely know each other, you don't know me and i don't know you. This is not another fairy tale where we live happily ever after!"

"I don't get you, Y/N" he sat down.

"Let's just... stop pretending" tears streamed down your cheeks "and just admit that we were never meant to be together, this was never actually real"

"I'm sorry but what i felt was real and if you don't see that... i can't help you" he sighed and left the room.