𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐄𝐒 | 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐊𝐒𝐎𝐍

• chapter 5 •

Mark POV

Recently, I've been kind of stressed. And it's because of Jackson. I like him as a friend, of course. But something is throwing me off balance. It took a while for me to figure out what it was, but I found out what. And it's Jinyoung. Jinyoung is extremely nice and all, a good friend. But for some reason, when I see him hanging out and laughing with Jackson, my heart starts to pound. It starts to hurt. And it makes no sense to me. I should be completely fine. But I'm not. I feel confused and angry and sad all at once. It's confusing me-- it's so many emotions at once that I can't focus. I had a hard time figuring it out. But I think it might be jealousy. So what was I jealous of? So I thought about it for a while... and the only possiblity is that really: I'm jealous of Jinyoung. I want to be the one hanging out with Jackson. I want to be the one laughing with him. I want to be with Jackson. I.. I want to be more than just friends. And that frustrates me.

I can't stand it. I don't want it to show. I want to be able to stand there without feeling sad and jealous. And why you may ask? I'm.. I'm scared. I've never noticed my feelings change so drastically for someone. I really like Jackson. But I know that there was more. If I asked any girl out. There's a high chance that she would say yes. But if I asked Jackson out. He'd probably reject me in less than a second, without a moment's thought. That possibility frightens me. Because, more than liking Jackson, well, I've been hanging out with him a lot and he's amazing-- funny, athletic, charming, and... I.. I love Jackson. I had fallen for him so bad. Rejection was crucial. I had never felt this towards anyone. Love wasn't something that you could just say or take for granted.

Love was frightening in a way. To love someone, it had to be really special. Love is not something meant to be said just to keep others around you happy. But-- I think I can tell. The way Jackson laughs, how he smiles, the fact that he cherishes his friends so much. It amazes me. It made me want to love him. It's almost like a spell, like being caught in a daze.

But, my biggest problem is: if Jackson rejects me, I'm not sure if I'll be able to feel this way again. If it doesn't work out- I might forget how to love.

I needed help. I can't do this alone. So I picked up my phone and called Taehyung-- and told him everything. He was one of my best friends, and he was in a relationship with Jungkook too. He should be able to help, I thought. When I finished explaining, the first thing he said was, "So what do you need me for? I support you one hundred percent. Go for it." I was glad Taehyung supported me but I still had one more thing left. "How do I confess?" There was a pause on the other line and then...
"I'll be right there." And he hung up.
Well alright then. All I needed was some advice but okay, I guess.

time skip because I have no ideas

V was pacing around my bedroom, trying to help me think of how to confess.
"After school?"
"Too cliché"
"Rooftop?"
"Too cold."
"Written note? Phone call?"
"I want to do it in person and be direct about my feelings."
Taehyung sighed, as he was running out of ideas. "Why don't you do what I did with Kookie and just say you want to meet up?"
"Sounds pretty simple, good." Finally. I slowly picked up my phone and clicked on Jackson's contact to call. When he picked up I quickly blurted out a "HeycanwemaybemeetuponSaturday?"
There was a pause and then a confused Jackson responded with "Uhh.. yeah that sounds good." They exchanged 'bye's and Mark hung up. Then, he took in a deep breath, and yelled out loudly. "wHaT hAvE i doNE, TaEhYuNG?? i'M reALLy gOiNG tO HavE To coNfeSs nOW."

"I know. Good luck." Smiled Taehyung, proud of his work. He had done what needed to be done: support his friend. Now it was up to Mark to carry out the plan they started. As long as the pressure didn't get to heavy, Mark should be fine.
It was Thursday night. Mark would have to wait two more nights before he got his opportunity to confess.

What he didn't realize though, was that Jackson was also having some very mixed feelings.

A/N: Short chapter this time but I hope you still enjoyed !