Living In The Shallows (UK Crush #1)

Chapter Eighteen

It must have been an hour later that the door connecting my room to Gethin's opened after a soft knock. I was wearing one of my oldest cotton nightgowns, with tiny buttons going all the way down the front, which had been washed so many times the threads could almost be counted. Teddy entered, smiling, with that slightly flushed look, full lips redder than usual, which I'd come to associate with him and alcohol consumption. He was completely steady on his feet and fully composed, so not that much, obviously; besides, it hadn't been that long, so they had obviously started imbibing after I'd left. I was ready for a break, anyway; all this paperwork was beginning to give me a headache.

"Hey there," I said, leaning back on the sofa and stretching my neck. "What's up?"

He shrugged. "Nothing, really. Just checking on you, seeing if you're still up and plugging away?" He leaned over to take a closer look. "History and Music Accreditation," he read aloud. "Sounds interesting."

"Trust me, it's not. Mind-numbingly dull." I sighed. "Sometimes I think this is the actual audition, that they put all this crap out there just to see if we can do it, and the piano playing is just a smokescreen, a ploy."

He pulled me into the curve of his arm in a by now familiar gesture. "Maybe you're just too tired to deal with it now. Leave it until you have an entire day, and start in the morning when you're fresh. The due dates on these papers don't seem to be until September and October. You've got loads of time." He gave me a little shake. "Hmm?"

"Maybe. I don't know. I like to get things done early." I relaxed against him, realizing I'd changed quite a bit in one short week. Sitting like this with him, with anyone, would have been impossible just a few days ago.

"Hey! Sit up, Birdie!" He pushed me up with his arm and turned me to face him.

"What?" I looked at him.

"Do you realize I have never, ever, seen you with your hair down?" he said in amazement.

"Oh," I said, suddenly embarrassed (honestly, why was embarrassment my knee jerk reaction to everything?). "It gets in the way, so I like to keep it up most of the time, but if I put it up while it's wet, it never dries, and I get a headache, so, yeah..." I trailed off.

"It's gorgeous." He touched it with a finger, wrapping it around his hand and letting it slip off. "Like living sable. I don't get it, though." He looked at me. "If having it long bothers you, why bother? Why not just keep it short?"

"Well, then I'd have to cut it all the time, and that takes money and effort. It's much easier to just keep it long and put it up. Besides..." I trailed off again.

"Besides?" he prompted, brushing my hair aside. He couldn't stop touching it.

I took a deep breath. "My mother liked it," I said. I would not cry. I bit back the tears, and they stayed back, for now.

"I see." He looked into my eyes, lifting my hair back over my shoulder. "My mum was the most important person in my life for a long, long time. I don't know what I would do if anything were to happen to her, especially if she were the only person I had." He left his hand on my shoulder, rubbing it lightly. "I think you're doing an amazing job with your life, Birdie, and I know she would be so, so proud of you if she were here. Truly."

"Thanks, Teddy." I reached out to hug him, and we stayed that way for a long time. When I released him, he put his hand on the back of my neck, and pulled my head to his, so our foreheads were touching. This was new. I kept my eyes closed. I felt his thumb on the tip of my chin, and realized our faces were getting closer. He was going to kiss me.

He was going to kiss me.

I put both of my hands against his chest and pushed him away. He resisted for the briefest of moments, then he let me, his arms falling away from around me. I scooted back on the couch so I could see his face more clearly.