Futatsu no Sekai (Two Worlds)

Chapter 3: Another

I stayed awake for hours on end, my lower eyelids suffering from my lack of sleep, and my body screaming at me to eat, sleep, do something. My fear of losing control lead me to becoming extremely unhealthy. Though it was winter break already, my parents still had work, and they weren't at the point to call for vacation. I didn't care, I was used to it. But my brother spent more time with his friends than he did me. It sucked, I really isolated myself now. I grabbed my phone and played melancholic songs until I accidentally fell asleep and I was right to fear sleep. 

The satisfying action of closing my eyes and becoming unconscious relaxed me for some time, but I realized that I shouldn't have let my guard down. Someone sneaked into my house--into my room.

My eyes swept open and my gaze aimed towards my door. I tried to get up, but I couldn't move.

Let's try that again. It could be a false alarm...

I looked at my arm, using all the energy I could to move, even if it was a tiny twitch. Nothing. I shut my eyes in disbelief. I lost control, but now I was finally aware of how it happened. I imagined myself running, or swinging a bat and attempted for the third time to move. My mind was sort of separated from my body. 

I opened my eyes and the room grew dark and grey. There stood a person facing my door. I recognized that hair. The grey hoodie. It was me again. I tried to speak and confront myself but only groaned with a raspy voice. 

"I didn't say you could talk," she said, "Not yet at least..."

Even if she looked like me, she sounded nothing like me. What was this, some kind of joke? She turned around, her eyes already locked on mine, and the room became darker as our bodies became bold through the darkness. It seemed like I lied down on the rippling dark floor, becoming dizzy on the seemingly pulsing ground. Like I was laying on the floor of a jumping house, and everyone was jumping so I couldn't get up.

She walked closer.

"You realize what you did, right?" she started.

What did she expect me to do speak? I couldn't even do that in the first place.

"Answer my question."

Nothing. I didn't even try speaking. What was I supposed to say? I didn't even know what the hell was going on.

"You realize I allowed you to speak, right? So speak!" she snapped.

"What did I do?"

"Did you ever see the messages?" she asked.

"Yes," I answered reluctantly.

"Then this should be an easy question," she began, "Do you feel anything? Guilt, sadness, anger, failure, disappointment? Or do you feel happy?"

"Why would I be happy?!" 

She grinned.  Did she seriously expect me to be happy? Where was she going with this?

"Because you smiled when you did it. You smiled when everyone cried! Was it that satisfying to hit her? What did she do to you?"

"I don't know!" I lied.

Having read the messages, I did know what happened. She called me out for being a fake friend.

"You liar. You're always lying to yourself. And everybody else," she said quietly yet sternly.

"She called me out..."

"Why do you sound so guilty? Weren't you happy?"

"I regret whatever I did!"