Yup! I'm finally back with another chapter that's not just an update!
Author: "Daisy Meadows"
Pages: 70
Lexile Level: 630
Publish Date: 2003
"Rachel spotted a little splash! In one of the pools. 'There's something in there, Kirsty!'"-2
Why are you so excited over seeing a splash in a small puddle of water? There's like a 99% chance that it's just a minnow or something. This is the same as whenever someone announces Superman in the older comics and such. They're always like "It's a bird! It's a plane! No! Its Superman!" I mean sure, I can get being excited over seeing Superman flying through the sky, but why would anyone be so excited over a bird or a plane, that they feel the need to point it out?
"Kirsty felt disappointed."-3
So they go over to this random puddle, and a crab comes out. Why are they disappointed? That's way more cool than a minnow! I would find it fascinating, but then again, I am a science nerd.
"'We'll keep looking[for fairies].'... Then she put her finger to her lips as their parents came up behind them. 'Shhh.'"-3
Wait, you mean to tell me that these girl's parents don't notice how their daughters spontaneously disappear??? How dumb are these people?? How have these people not called the police yet? I remember in one book, they're walking through a really foggy and sketchy forest, they said they would "be right back" to their parents. But, they were in that forest for hours! These "parents" are terrible at parenting.
"'Let the magic come to you,' ... We should just enjoy our vacation and wait for the magic to happen."-6
So let's put this in an all human scenario. So you're lost on some random island that you've never been on before. You're supposed to find these two girls. Would you be looking for them at the police station, the lobby of the hotel, or the beach? If you said beach, what, are you gonna circle the whole island? Why don't these girls go to a recognizable location? Idiots.
"'If we find a piece of driftwood, maybe we can use it to open the shell.'"-15
They can't pry this scallop open with their bare hands. Ok. But on the previous pages they were describing the long thin shells that they had picked up, and dropped on the ground right after finding the scallop. Just use one of those!! These people are so stupid.
"It was a shimmering golden feather"-17
Ok, so the assistance they get from the "fairy queen" is a feather. How are they supposed to open a scallop with a feather?? Why not just give them a hammer? That would work. They have no reason to not destroy the scallop, just hit it against a rock or something!
"'I'm free!'"-23
One third of the way into the book, and the conflict's already been resolved. What is the point of the other 47 pages???? Why can't the book just end right here? - -
"My wings are a bit stiff after being in the shell," she told them "I don't think I can fly very far yet."-29
BOI! YOU WERE LITERALLY JUST FLYING AROUND LIKE A MANIAC! YOU WERE DOING CARTWHEELS THROUGH THE AIR! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOU CAN'T FLY?????
"Where was Ruby?"-31
What do you do when the conflict of the book has already been resolved? Create a new conflict with a character from the previous book. Of course! Why didn't I think of that! Take notes strange-quark !!!
"'It's much better if I look like an ordinary frog.'"-35
So basically, the girls find a talking frog, and he works for the "fairy king." He's telling them about how he must blend into the island, BUT HE'S WEARING GLASSES!! HOW ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE AN ORDINARY FROG WHILE WEARING GLASSES???
"The shell seemed very heavy now that Rachel and Kirsty were the same size as Ruby and Amber."-44
So they found Ruby, and there is not a base of operations in this magical pot in the woods. They want to put the scallop from earlier in the pot. But like the idiots they are, they decide to transform into fairies before they put it in the pot. Why? That's just plain dumb. Good job, now the shell's too heavy for you, and the frog guy has to do all the work.
"The top of the pot was covered with a thick sheet of ice."-57
Just break it. I don't get why they're so worried. Just get a rock and chuck it at the ice. I mean how thick could the ice possibly be? It takes 200lbs of force to break a 2 inch layer of ice. Just throw rocks at it! Or like I said earlier, the "fairy queen" really should've given them a hammer.
"One more jump, and the ice shattered into little pieces."-61
Wait, WHAT? I thought the ice was so thick that "No one, not even a fairy, could get through." But a frog broke it with three jumps. Really? I'm not buying it. SCIENCE TIME!!!
So after some research, math, and conversions, I have come to the conclusion that the average frog jump exerts .00454 Newtons of force. I also said that the sheet of ice had a diameter of 15cm.
Ok, drum roll please............ the ice sheet was literally .343 cm thick. Wow , just wow. I just wanna throw this book at a wall. Please.
Summary Time!
Ok, well after all that excessive research on frogs and more physics calculations than my brain can handle, i'm just done. With everything.
So, someone's trapped, they get saved and reunited with their friend.
I'm trying to think of what I should add to that, but that's literally all that happened.
Well! My brain melted, I don't physics a lot.
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